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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27103417">The Road Back To You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/0alchemy0/pseuds/0alchemy0'>0alchemy0</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Car Accidents, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mild Language, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Tags May Change, Temporary Amnesia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 04:48:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>23,099</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27103417</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/0alchemy0/pseuds/0alchemy0</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Yuuri gets in a car crash and suffers from amnesia. He doesn’t remember anything other than his name. His family and friends remain strangers to him.<br/>__________</p>
<p>Uploads for this fic every monday!!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Nishigori Takeshi/Nishigori Yuuko</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>153</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>When he got the phone call, Viktor felt sick to his stomach. He doesn’t remember if he threw up or not. His knees buckled under him, his breathing was erratic. Him and Yuuri have been in New York for a few weeks doing a skating workshop. Yuuri was going to be on the news and skate at Rockefeller Plaza and then have an interview and talk about skating and what not. He was deemed the most Influential skater in the entire ISU. Yuuri and the news anchors were going over everything and Yuuri did a run through of everything and then he was going to head back to their hotel. Only in one of the super busy intersections, he was hit. It was buy a huge SUV that was speeding through the intersection. They were trying to avoid stopping at the light but it had long since changed to red by the time Yuuri was in the middle of the intersection. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was just arriving at the hospital when they were bringing Yuuri into surgery. He was covered in blood-soaked bandages. He is already hooked up to a million machines and IVs and Viktor felt like a rug was ripped out from under his feet. Yuuri is his whole world. He lives and breathes for Yuuri. A doctor comes and finds him and begins to fill him in on everything that’s going on with him physically. Viktor is only half listening because he has this heavy, terrifying feeling that Yuuri isn’t going to walk away from this as easily as the one in the SUV is going to walk away from it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right now, our most pressing matter is the fact that he has a brain bleed, nothing too huge, but we’re going to take care of that before we do anything else so there’s no psychological permanent damage,” The Doctor says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Will he be okay?” Viktor chokes the on the words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We are very hopeful that the broken bones and lacerations will heal beautifully, our only hesitation is the brain. We won’t be able to tell the extent of the damage until he wakes up. We will have a better picture of what’s going on mentally than what we have right now,” Viktor nods, only he feels like all of this information is coming in one ear and going out the other. “I take it you would like him moved to a VIP room? It offers you two and your families a little bit more privacy.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Y-Yes please,” Viktor thanks the doctor and he slumps down into a chair. He pulls out his phone and does the hardest thing he’ll probably ever have to do, he calls Yuuri’s parents, not knowing what time it is there, and telling them what’s going on. It doesn’t take long for the tabloids to tell everyone that Yuuri was in the crash and then the fans spread it so in a mater of minutes, the news that Yuuri was in a car crash has spread like wildfire through the entire world. Phichit and Chris are in California and they are booking flights here, Yuuri’s parent’s got a flight for the next day, Viktor’s mother couldn’t get a flight out, but she offers to pay the bills for Viktor so he doesn’t have to think about it - so his main focus can be on Yuuri and his road to recovery. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While he waits, Viktor is thrown into some sort of limbo. He can’t tell if time is trugging on or if it is speeding by. Someone sits next to him and tries to make polite conversation, but he’s so absent minded that he barely pushes out two words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My son is in here with a minor concussion and some cuts. He was in a car crash, who are you waiting here for?” she’s a short, round woman with wiry blondish grey hair. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My husband,” Viktor replies. He’s sitting next the mother of the man who put Yuuri here. “Your son hit his car.” The look of horror on her face will be something he will never forget. She doesn’t even say she’s sorry on his behalf, or hopes that Yuuri is okay. She just sits there silently. Part of Viktor wonders if she is silent because she’s against the fact that Viktor has a husband and thinks that her son did a public service. Either way, Viktor gets up and walks around to try to get rid of the anger that’s pooling inside of him. All of his life, he has been the “forgive and forget” type, but this is something he won’t forgive nor will he forget. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The press try to worm their way into the hospital to get the inside on what’s going on with Yuuri because to them this is just a popularity contest to see who can get the better, more detailed story first. Something like this is going to go down in history in the skating world. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s hours later before Viktor is allowed into Yuuri’s room. He’s spent the better part of one of those hours, watching the news coverage of the crash; Watching drone shots of the wreckage, the EMTs prying the drivers side of Yuuri’s car open to get him out. He watched all the way up until they were loading the wreckage on trucks and toeing it away. The intersection opens up again as if nothing happened the moment everyone is done with it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was a surreal feeling walking into Yuuri’s room. His head is covered in a white bandage, his face has little patches on them from cuts from the glass shards. He has spikes in his right hip, it was broken badly from the crash. His skin is a litter of bruises and patches covering up tiny open wounds. He has a brainwave monitor, and IV, a nurse is taking out an empty blood bag, he has an oxygen cannula. He should have brought Yuuri his extra pair of glasses. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This is everything that was on him when he was brought in,” A nurse says handing Viktor a clear plastic bag with his shoes, phone, and the wedding ring. “The things from the car are in the bag on that chair.” His skatebag made it, although that’s the least of Viktor’s worries. He opens it and the skates look as they did before all of this His glasses case is inside with them in it. He uses contacts when he skates. The doctors say they don’t know how long it will be until Yuuri wakes up, but they’re very positive he’s going to wake up. The VIP room is nice, it has a little closet and inside of it is a cot. The chair in the room is also a recliner so it can also be slept on. There are extra pillows and blankets inside. Viktor knows one things for sure - he’s not leaving here without Yuuri. He drags the chair up to Yuuri’s beside and he gently holds his hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yuuri, I’m right here. You’re going to be fine,” He says, his voice is barely above a whisper. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Yuuko arrives with Yuuri’s parent’s in the morning. She came as their translator and to be here for Yuuri and Viktor. They all sit silently in Yuuri’s room, watching the monitor’s waiting for him to wake up. Viktor begins to think the minor brain bleed Yuuri had caused more damage than the doctors said it would. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“All of you guys’s fans are outside, waiting on any good news about you guys,” Yuuko says, giving Viktor some tea in a thermos. Yuuri’s mother brought a whole separate little baggy of Viktor and Yuuri’s favourites. They made some at the hotel before coming over. “They should be leaving around noon time. Isn’t that what happened to Phichit when he got his wisdom teeth taken out? Everyone waited outside the dentist’s office until noon before they all cleared up and left to go home. I don’t know, I’m trying to help keep your mind away from the dark and scary thoughts.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you Yuuko, I appreciate it,” He says and he does. He stares at Yuuri’s sleeping face. A nurse comes in and switches his IV bag once and then some time later she checks his vitals before he starts moving. First his hands twitch and then his face scrunches up as he tries to open his eyes. Thank god there is a doctor in the room, she does a mini neuro check to make sure there isn’t any damage to his sight or motor functions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you tell me where you are?” The doctor asks. He looks at the doctor with a confused face. “Yuuri, can you understand me?” Yuuko steps up and translates everything to Japanese. He starts responding to all of the doctors questions in Japanese. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>What the fuck is happening? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor thinks to himself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Your name is Yuuri Katsuki, these are your parents, I’m your best friend, Yuuko and this is your husband, Viktor Nikiforov,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yuuko tells him in Japanese. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You where in a car crash, and you’re a figure skater.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He has amnesia. It’s a common side effect to brain bleeds-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How long will it last?” Viktor asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s no telling how long. We can’t gauge how well brain injuries - minor or major - will heal. We can’t tell as well as we can with someone with a broken arm or rib.” The doctor goes into finer detail about everything, but Viktor zones out looking at the lost look on Yuuri’s face. He doesn’t remember anything. The life they have together in Japan, his career, his life, how amazing he is. Viktor watches as he does his normal nervous antics. Things he hasn’t done in years - since they first met and when Viktor first started being his coach. Viktor excuses himself from the room. He barely makes it outside the door before his body is hit with a pain he’s never felt before. He leans against the wall and slides down until he’s on the floor. Yuuko follows after him, leaving Yuuri’s parents in the room to talk to him and see if they can get him to remember anything. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He doesn’t remember anything,” Viktor chokes out. Yuuko sits next to him on the floor. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The doctor said it’s temporary-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How long until he remembers me, or who he is. I-” His breathing wavers and he stumbles over his words. Yuuko leans her head on his shoulder - something she does to Yuuri when he’s a blubbering mess as Viktor is. “He doesn’t remember the life we’ve built together. He doesn’t remember his family. You saw how he just looked right through them.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Viktor, freaking out like this is only going to make Yuuri freak out. How about we just take it one day at a time. We go back to Japan when he’s medically cleared to do so, that way he’s around people who speak the language he speaks,” He leans his head against the wall, hot tears running out of his eyes. “It’s not an ideal plan, but it will work, okay? We’re going to go back in there and be there for him, wether he remembers us or not. So pull yourself together and then get your ass back in there.” Yuuko stands up, brushes the dust off of her pants and walks back into the room. Viktor takes a moment before putting on a brave face and stepping into the room with his husband who has no idea who he is. Viktor smiles sweetly when he walks into the room and Yuuri’s face gets red. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Here, this is a video of you competing last year,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yuuko says, handing Yuuri her phone with the video pulled up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“That’s me?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He says in disbelief. He watches the entire programme in awe. He especially watches the part when he steps off the ice, into Viktor’s arms as he swings him around in a circle. Yuuri tries, really hard, to remember, but he can’t. He feels guilty that he can’t remember anything. Yuuko tells him not to worry and that they’re going to be bringing him back to Japan as soon as possible.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Maybe I’ll remember more if I’m in Japan,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yuuri suggests. He looks at Viktor and sees how despite him trying to hide his hurt, it’s written all over his face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>___________</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Waiting isn’t easy. Viktor thought everything would be fine a month ago because Yuuri woke up speaking English. But he still looked right through Viktor, not remembering their marriage. He knows that they are married, but doesn’t remember the warm, safe feeling he got when ever he was around him. Despite it all, Viktor is still there, standing by Yuuri’s side, fighting off the press trying to get the inside scoop on Yuuri. Viktor knows if Yuuri had his memory back he would have wanted this. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When he was medically cleared to go home, Yuuri was still walking on crutches when he can, but he was mainly in a wheelchair because standing up for too long hurt his back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you rather go back to our apartment, or your parents house?” Viktor asked. Yuuko went home last week to prepare for Yuuri. She told the press that they were coming home at the end of the month instead of right in the middle so they can get from the air port to the house without being bombarded. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can I go to my parents house?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course. I’ll let Yuuko know,” Viktor says. He sends her a quick text letting her know what the plan is. Yuuri has never been one to really love flying and even if he doesn’t remember it, the whole plane ride home, he jumps at any turbulence. The only difference is Yuuri doesn’t turn to Viktor as he used to for comfort. He doesn’t hold his hand or lean on his shoulder and fall asleep. No one on the flight notices them, nor does anyone in the airport. They wore baseball caps and masks since it’s the winter in Japan and the smog is ridiculous. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They get to the Inn by lunch time and Viktor flops down on the couch in the living room, exhausted from a full day of travelling. Yuuri walks around the house, looking at old family photos. He slips into his room and curls up on the bed, everything feeling familiar, but at the same time everything is foriegn. Viktor woke up in the middle of the night. He hears Yuuri rummaging around in the kitchen. Viktor gets up from the couch and walks into the kitchen.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh sorry, did I wake you?” Yuuri asks. Viktor shakes his head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No. Do you want me to make you something? I know it’s hard to get around with those,” He says, nodding to the crutches. Yuuri shyly nods his head, he sits down at the dining room table and watches as Viktor rubs the sleep from his eyes and opens the fridge. He doesn’t see anything worth making a meal out of here. He waves Yuuri to follow him. They walk through the Inn that is full of sleeping guests. They walk into he kitchen. Yuuri sits on the counter and Viktor goes through the pantry and starts making small dishes. It’s nothing too fancy, some rice, some vegetables, some meat. It tasted amazing, though. A midnight snack was nice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If figure skating didn’t work out, you could have been an amazing chef,” Yuuri says Viktor smiles softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I became a coach,” Viktor replies. “I love skating no matter what, but it got boring, so I became a coach. Your coach, to be exact.”</span>
</p>
<p><span>“Let me get this straight,” Yuuri says, swallowing a mouthful of vegetables. “You were my idol, I got completely sloshed and asked you to coach me, you agreed, we feel in love and got married?” Viktor nods. “Wow.”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“‘Wow’ what?”</span></p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing, just never thought I would be that person. I take it I was very shy,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You were and still kind of are insanely shy,” Viktor replies. “It got better with time from when I first me you to now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not now, now? Because I still feel kind of awkward,” Viktor chuckles. Yuuri’s face gets red and looks down at his plate. “When my leg gets better can I skate?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, after we do off ice training to build up all of the muscle,” Viktor says. “Don’t worry, I’ll go easy for the first couple of weeks.” Yuuri’s face gets even redder, Viktor hasn’t seen him blush like this since when he first came to Hasetsu. As they’re cleaning up, Viktor’s phone rings. He picks it up, seeing as it’s his mother. She has called every day since the accident. It used to be weekly calls between her and Viktor and he would fill her in on the “behind the scenes” stuff to his and Yuuri’s life. The stuff the press and the media and the fans don’t see. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hello, mum,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Ah, hello!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says sounding surprised “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I didn’t think you would pick up, I thought you would be sleeping. How are you doing, how is Yuuri doing?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good, we just finished... Dinner I think. It’s the middle of the night here,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says, pinching his phone between his ear and his shoulder while he finished cleaning up. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“We’re jet lagged, but we’re good.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Has he remembered anything?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p><em><span>“Not really,” </span></em><span>Viktor replies, setting the drying towel out to dry. </span><em><span>“There are little things here and there that he says that he remembers, but other than that, nothing. I mean, he remembered which room is his and remembers where all of the silverware and stuff goes. That’s progress, right?”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“Yes,” </span></em><span>She says </span><em><span>“When he gets better you two should visit. A good visit will do him good.”</span></em></p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Alright, mum, sounds good,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says. Despite being the prodigy, the golden boy of Russia, it is still extremely homophobic. Yes a lot of his queer friends live there, but they also live in highly secured buildings, like Yuri and Otabek. He and Yuuri have visited Russia many times after they got married. Viktor was on edge about the whole trip because for as many supportive fans they had, there where also people who are completely against it. It’s safer in Japan for them. Viktor will do anything for his mother, even if it means visiting Russia and even facing his father. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Well, I’ll let you two go for the night. Tomorrow get on a sleeping schedule to counteract the jet lag, okay?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p><em><span>“I will, mum,”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“I love you, son,” </span></em><span>She says. Viktor smiles. </span></p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I love you too mum,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> He hands up and Yuuri has a star-struck look in his eyes. “What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I understood some of what you where saying,” Yuuri says. “I- I don’t know how… Did you teach me some?” Viktor nods. “This means I’m getting better, right?” Viktor smiles from ear to ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think so!” Yuuri smiles as well, but his falls. “What’s wrong?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing, just. I don’t know. If I’m remembering small things, why aren’t I remembering the big things like you and our life together? I barely remember my childhood, just bits and pieces,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay,” Viktor says, reaching out to Yuuri. “These things take time. How about we go sit on the couch and watch some TV until we’re tired or something, hmm?” Yuuri nods his head. Viktor leads the way back to the house and the two sit on the couch, on opposite sides. Yuuri has his good leg brought up to his chest while his other leg, the one in the huge, bulkley cast is resting on a coffee table. Makkachin jumps up from the floor onto the couch and sprawls out between the two. Viktor smiles to himself and pets her head as she falls asleep in the space between them. Yuuri falls asleep next which makes Viktor think that he didn’t really sleep at all when they got home. Viktor stands ans turns the tv off, waking Makkachin. He picks Yuuri up bridal style, careful of his arm that’s in a sling and his leg in the cast and he walks him into Yuuri’s room. Yuuri wakes up but is too tired to protest being carried. Viktor sets him down on the bed gently and helps him out of the sling and the cast, doctors orders to not sleep in the cast on his leg. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you mind if you sleep in the guest room. I know we’re married but I-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No it’s fine,” Viktor says, pulling the blanket over Yuuri. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Yuuri says, looking away from Viktor.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not be sorry, it’s fine,” Viktor replies. “My room is down the hall if you need anything.” Yuuri nods and sinks into the bed. Viktor walks out of the room and down the hall to the guest bedroom. Makkachin stands in the hall, confused to which room she wants to go in ans confused to why they are in separate rooms. She trots into Viktor’s room and curls up next to him, waiting for Yuuri to come into the room, but he never does. They wake up super late - around lunch time. Viktor walks down the hall and sees Makkachin sitting outside Yuuri’s room, Vitkor quietly opens the door and she walks in and jumps up on to the bed with him, waiting for Viktor. She tilts her head as he closes the door and walks into the kitchen. Yuuko is sitting at the table, having tea with Yuuri’s mother. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good noon,” Yuuko says, pouring Viktor a cup of tea. He thanks her groggily. “Everything alright between you and Yuuri, you guys where in different rooms last night.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, everything is fine. He didn’t want to sleep in the same room. I don’t know. He still hasn’t warmed up to the fact that we’re married. I guess I’m still a stranger to him,” Yuuko gives him a sad look and reaches out and puts her hand on top of his. “It’s fine, honestly.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We don’t have hockey or lessons today at the rink. I can close it for a private rental,” She says. Viktor smiles and thanks her. He finishes his tea, gets something to eat and he drives back to the apartment building. Today was harder to avoid the press. They were flocked outside the apartments front doors being held back by security. Viktor pushed through all of the reporters asking him for an update on Yuuri. He told them that it’s his and Yuuri’s wishes that they have some space and peace from the press while he is still in recovery. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They where reluctant to leave while Viktor was in his apartment, getting his sating stuff, but they left eventually. He met Yuuko at the skating rink, the triplets where all buzzing with excitement that Viktor is back in the country. When he isn’t coaching Yuuri or traveling, he is coaching the girls to skate. They’ve all almost mastered all of their single jumps. Being back on the ice brings back so many nostalgic memories for Viktor. Memories of him and Yuuri, and of them coaching the beginner skaters and the little children all trying to do impressions of Viktor’s accent. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He hasn’t skated in a while so he is a tiny bit rusty, but he is doing quads and triple axels in no time. He finds himself skating to the programme he had choreographed for Yuuri this season.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Yuuko brought Yuuri to the rink when he woke up. He had asked where Viktor went and Yuuko said he was at the rink, so she brought him there. Yuuri hobbles into the arena and watches Viktor skate through the glass door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I could skate like that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yup,” Yuuko says, trying to shoo her girls away because they don’t have a full grasp on what is going on with Yuuri. He is completely awestruck as he watches Viktor skate. He walks inside of the rink and leans against the boards, watching as Viktor is off in his own world. Yuuri tries to force himself to remember life before the car crash. Life before he was grasping at straws at everything, feeling the vague familiarity of everything, but not being able to ever put his finger on it. He is so thankful for everyone around him because of how patient they have been, but he knows it’s incredibly hard on them. He has tried so many different things, looking at old videos of himself, looking through his phone and laptop, trying to remember something, but he doesn’t. It all feels so far away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Viktor and Yuuri lock eyes. He continues to skate. Yuuri knows he should feel something but he doesn’t. Viktor is just a person that he knows he should feel something towards, but he doesn’t feel anything. He finishes skating, drenched in sweat and panting heavily. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That was amazing,” Yuuri says as Viktor wipes his face dry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks. It’s the programme I was working on for you,” He says. “I’m sure next season if you’re up for it, it’s all yours.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I still can’t believe I can skate like that,” Yuuri says. He follows Viktor to the locker room. Viktor unties his skates, and wipes the blades dry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You are amazing on the ice,” Viktor says. “You’re full of just raw talent. You don’t focus just on all of the technical elements, you’re there for the presentational elements as well. I find skaters are all focused on the technical elements to be the best of the best. They don’t realize both contribute to the programme. You have to captivate your audience and the judges.” He says. He puts his skates in his bag and looks up at Yuuri. “You know?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I feel like at one point I did,” He tries to Joke. He sees Viktor forcing himself to smile. Viktor packs all his skating stuff up and he and Yuuri walk out of the rink. Viktor drives them back to the Inn. There are a million people crowding outside of the Inn. Mari and Yuui’s parents are fighting them off. Viktor keeps on driving down the road until they are at the apartment. No reporters are there. He parks and Yuuri follows him inside and to their apartment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri’s jaw drops when he walks inside of the apartment. It’s nothing huge, but it is gorgeous. Everything looks so expensive, but Yuuri has a gut feeling that nothing was actually as expensive as it looks. Viktor kicks his shoes off and takes his and Yuuri’s coats and hangs them up. They have a loft apartment. The living toom is under the loft to the right of the door and the kitchen and dinning room is to the left of the front door, not under the loft. There is a huge window where if Yuuri looks hard enough he can see the Inn. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We can stay here for a little bit until I hear back from your sister about the news reporters and fans clearing out at the Inn,” Viktor says. Yuuri hobbles into the kitchen looking for something to eat. Viktor is up in the loft. Yuuri hears the shower turn on from the bathroom off of the loft. He uses this unsupervised time to hobble around the apartment, looking at all of the photos. In the livingroom, there is a photo collage from their Honeymoon with their wedding photo in the centre. Yuuri feels such Deja vu looking at all of this and that’s good. It’s good it means he’s remembering everything. Viktor walks down the spiral staircase wearing a hoodie and some sweatpants. His hair is damp and sticking to his forehead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri’s heart skips a beat because he is hot. He knows he doesn’t have to strive for his attention because he already did. He just doesn’t remember it. Makkachin trots down the staircase and she jumps up on the loveseat. Yuuri hobbles away from the pictures and he sits down next to him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mari said most of the reporters are gone so if you want to go back there I can drop you off,” Viktor says, holding Makkachin back from licking Yuuri’s face. Yuuri nods his head slowly. ”We could stay here if you wanted to as well, I don’t mind taking the guest room.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, I can take it, you already did at the Inn,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t mind,” Viktor replies. Makkachin settles down and does what ever big dog does and thinks that she’s a lap dog and tries to curl up into Yuuri’s lap. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I feel bad,” Yuuri says. “I look around at all of these photos and know that there are memories behind them, but I don’t remember them and I know I loved you once but I don’t feel it. I know it’s the amnesia, but I don’t know.” Yuuri says, looking everywhere else but at Viktor. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s fine, Yuuri-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No it’s not,” Yuuri says, his eyes welling up with tears. This is the first time since he woke up that he is really possessing things. Maybe being back in New York, not surrounded by photos and memories was better than being here in Japan constantly reminded of moments he wants so desperately to remember but he can’t. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You keep telling me it’s fine but it’s not fine. Look how happy we looked in those photos! You look at me the same way and I don’t know how to return it because while I know you are my husband, it feels like I met you for the first time only months ago. So don’t tell me it’s fine when you’re hurting too. I know this is painful for you to have someone you love look at you like you don’t even matter. It’s written all over your face,” Yuuri says, beaming with frustration. They’re silent for a moment.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you like me to bring you back to the Inn? Or I could go there…” Viktor says softly. Yuuri wipes his face dry and nods his head slowly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you drive me to the inn, please?” Viktor nods and gets up. Makkachin senses the tension and walks by Yuuri’s feet trying to figure out what is going on. Viktor gives her a sympathetic smile seeing as he’s not going to take her on this short car ride. They silently get their shoes and coats on and walk out the door to Viktor’s car. Yuuri’s is parked next to his, where it has remained since they went to New York. They silently drive back to the Inn which has finally been ridded of all the news reporters. He pulls up to the walk way and Yuuri just sits in the car for a moment, looking at his lap.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry for yelling,” He says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay, I get it you’re frustrated-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not okay! You have to stop doing that, Viktor,” He says, this being the first time in months he has actually said his name. Yuuri sighs heavily. “It’s not okay.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t control it, so of course I’m going to be sympathetic and always jump to your defense,” Viktor says. He unlocks the car and Yuuri thanks him for dropping him off and he walks up the pathway to the front door. Viktor waits until he is inside and the door is closed behind him before he drives back to the apartment. Viktor’s phone rings and he wants to believe it’s Yuuri and that he’s calling him to come back. He was right about it being Yuri, just not the right one. Viktor answers the call and Yurio’s voice comes on through the speakers in the car.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Where are you?”</span>
  </em>
  <span> He asks, sounding jet lagged. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Driving home from the Inn… why?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Beka and I are in the lobby and you’re not here so they’re not letting us up. Where are you?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>One thing is for sure, he has not changed with age. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’ll be there shortly,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor hangs up and takes the short cut to the apartment. Yurio is in the lobby with Otabek standing next to him. Yurio has a stone faced look as he watches Viktor walk through the glass doors. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Coach me,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yurio says. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re not coaching Yuuri, so coach me.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Otabek clearly thought this was going to be a visit to see how Yuuri was doing, not Yurio coming in and asking for Viktor to coach him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I will be coaching him when he gets better,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“How long will that take?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor shrugs his shoulders. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Exactly. We start tomorrow morning. We’re going to need a key to the apartment,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Why?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“So we’re not going to be staying up in a hotel, c’mon, get a move on, give me Yuuri’s key or something,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Otabek tries to tell Yurio that maybe this isn’t a good idea but when has he really listened to anyone. He wants to keep his world title, Viktor understands that, but part of him thinks that maybe he isn’t ready to be coaching right now. Yuuri barely even remembers anything. He brings the two to the apartment, Makkachin is over the moon that there are more people here. She loves walking around the sitting area at the Inn and saying hi to everyone and getting table scraps when she can. Yurio strides into the guest bedroom and it’s only a matter of minutes before Viktor and Otabek hear him jumping into the shower. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He said we were just going to visit,” Otabek holds his hands up in defense.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s fine,” Viktor replies. “Can I get you anything to eat or drink?” He shakes his head politely. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How is everything?” He asks, looking around and not seeing Yuuri. Viktor is silent for a moment. “That bad?” Viktor nods. “He’ll remember everything eventually, he has to. Everything on the news was about him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He hates it,” Viktor replies. “He doesn’t like being here because of all the photos, he doesn’t like me saying everything is fine if he can’t remember something or if he doesn’t really want to be around me. He doesn’t really like being in cars. Seems like the only thing he actually remembers is the crash. He grips the arm rests like his life depends on it. I don’t say anything because he doesn’t want to talk.” He shrugs his shoulders. “We’re getting there though, slowly. He overheard me talking to my mum on the phone and he understood some of it. So progress.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, but understanding fragments of a language isn’t much progress. Does he even remember skating?” Viktor shakes his head. “That’s probably why Yurio is here, to take advantage of the situation and get even more ahead of him than he is now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He hasn’t changed,” Otabek chuckles and nods his head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just trying to step out of you and Yuuri’s shadow, that’s all,” Otabek replies.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The other babes have made an entrance! </p>
<p>thank you for reading this chapter, stay tuned for the next<br/>XOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I promise this is the right chapter for the right fic XD</p><p>Also, there is references to mental health issues and past self hard mentioned in this chapter. They're at the last few lines of the chapter. I had this chapter out for a little bit, completely not thinking about it, and I'm sorry!!!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As demand by Yurio, bright and early in the morning, Viktor, Otabek and Yurio all make their way to the rink. Yurio is ready as ever and is annoyed with the fact that Viktor isn’t coaching him the way he coached Yuuri. He tries to ignore it, but it’s there and everyone knows it. </p><p>“You need more lift on the axel,” Viktor says “You’re just throwing yourself into it and trying to get the rotations with little height.” His voice echoes through the rink. Yurio does as told, and tries to not throw himself into the triple axels, but it’s become a bad habit Yakov can’t break- Otabek tells him as such. </p><p>“Do a waltz-loop” He says. </p><p>“What?! No! That’s counter productive,” Yurio yells. </p><p>“Humour me,” Viktor says. Yurio reluctantly does so. “Again, more knee bend on the loop,” he says. Gradually he stops whipping himself up into the jumps and takes his time. “When you’re warming up your jumps, start from waltz loop and work your way up, slowly to the triple axel. Do a lutz,”</p><p>“Single?”</p><p>“Single,” </p><p>“Why are you bringing me back to the basics?” Yurio asks, kind of annoyed. </p><p>“What would Yakov do when he got new students? He would see where all of their foundations are and then work upwards. I’m doing the same thing. Single jumps up to quads,” Viktor says, nodding to the rink. Yurio scowls, hating when Yakov made him go back to the basics and work his way up. Deep down, he is thankful for it. Yurio’s lutz looks perfect. Viktor has him do it a million more times all the way up to a triple and he stops him there. </p><p>“Why aren’t I doing any quads?”</p><p>“Because, I said so, today we’re doing up to triples, tomorrow doubles up to quads,” Viktor replies. “Flips.”</p><p>Yuuko watches from behind the glass pane in the door. She watches Viktor coach Yurio on his jumps and his spins and laughs when Yurio gives him lip about doing something he doesn’t seem as productive. She heard from Yuuri that he and Viktor got in a little bit of a fight last night. Though it doesn’t really count as a fight seeing as they haven’t been the couple that all of the world knows and loves. They all have an image in their head of how Viktor is helping taking care of Yuuri, but there is some serious turmoil in their lives right now. When the lesson is over, Viktor waits for Yurio and Otabek in the lobby. He talks with Yuuko, trying to avoid asking about Yuuri, but she knows better.</p><p>“He is overwhelmed,” She says. </p><p>“I know,”</p><p>“You guys should go on a vacation,”</p><p>“New York was a vacation. He had one interview and-”</p><p>“You guys need an actual vacation,”</p><p>“Yurio won’t like that. He wants me to coach him,”<br/>“Yeah? And what do you want?” She asks. “Look, he feels overwhelmed by the amount of everything reminding him of everything he lost from that crash. Maybe when he gets off of the crutches you guys go somewhere, go to France, or to a beach somewhere, a cabin in the middle of the woods, somewhere neutral, not here, not Russia, somewhere new.” She says. She does make a compelling argument. “He is a the Inn, looking miserable and he has an appointment tomorrow so be nice because I have a ballet recital for the girls to go to so I can’t drive him if you guy get in another row,”</p><p>“It wasn’t even really a fight, he was just frustrated with me for… I don’t even remember.” </p><p>“Okay, well regardless, when he is better and is able to walk on his own, you guys should go on a vacation. Oo! Go somewhere rural so then you’re stuck in a cabin or something together and then he can’t hide out at the Inn and you can’t hide out at the rink or in the apartment. Before you say ‘what about Yurio’ he can go back home to Russia and suck it up with Yakov or Mila. I hear she is coaching these days as well, right?” Yuuko has always been four steps ahead of Viktor lately. He nods. “Now, go to the Inn because he is sulking.” She pushes him out of the rink, before he can talk to Yurio about off ice training. He drives straight to the Inn, despite in his skating attire and not in something more comfy. Yuuri was sulking over a bowl of soup while reading a book. A book that he read years ago and said it was his all time favourite. </p><p>“We have the rest of the books in that series back at the apartment if you want to pick them up after the appointment tomorrow,” Viktor says. Yuuri looks up from the book and pushes his glass up on his nose. </p><p>“Was this my favourite book?” He asks. Viktor nods. He kind of sinks in his chair a little bit. </p><p>“If you think on the bright side, you get the chills all over again when you read the new book, you know what I mean?” Viktor says. Yuuri smiles. “Anyway, what part are you at right now?”</p><p>“The characters all got their letters from that weird group… <em> Alexandrium </em>. I Believe and they’re all contemplating and reacting to having to meet up at the old Cliff house in different ways and it’s all really starting to pick up,” He says, he closes the book for a moment to eat more soup. He has a lingering smile. </p><p>“Keep me updated about the book, huh? I’ve never been much of a reader, but I love it when you retell the stories,” </p><p>“How did I retell the stories?” Yuuri asks. </p><p>“That’s for you to figure out,” Viktor says “You retell how you want to. I don’t want to tell you you did it one way and then you try to be that way, just go with he flow.” Yuuri is silent for a moment.</p><p>“I have a question,” Yuuri says slowly, not looking up at Viktor and keeping his eyes down.</p><p>“Yeah, what’s up?” Viktor leans forward in hs seat. </p><p>“I was just… looking around and I saw a medication bottle in my dresser drawers. I didn’t really understand the labels, I figured you would know what they were more than I do. Everyone has been so busy with guests, I didn’t want to bother them,”</p><p>“They’re anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medication,” Viktor says. </p><p>“Oh,” Yuuri looks up at him then back down at his lap “It then would explain these,” Viktor looks up and sees Yuuri rolling up his sleeves and looking at the faint, silver scars on his arms. Viktor nods slowly. </p><p>“Those were all from before we met,” Viktor says. “You have gotten better at handling all of it, and I’m always here if you need me.” Yuuri smiles softly as he unrolls his sleeves. Viktor grabs something to eat and sits across from Yuuri who is nose deep in his book. Viktor looks up and watches as Yuuri’s expressions basically tell the story. He has always had a very expressional face when he was reading.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you enjoyed this chapter and as well as the other fic I'm uploading, I'm going to upload two chapters because I've finally gotten ahead with writing so I can upload two at a time so y'all have a little extra to read!!</p><p>XOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“I think we should go on a vacation,” Viktor says. He’s driving Yuuri to the doctors appointment where hopefully Yuuri will be getting off of the crutches today. He has been doing the PT that he has been told to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A vacation?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Viktor says “You know, go somewhere neutral where you’re not being slapped in the face by memories. I was thinking… Theres this little cabin in Alaska. Right on the ocean, it has a fire place and a small little down just down the road from it. It’ll be fun.” Yuuri nods his head slowly. “You don’t think so?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No I think it’ll be nice. Alaska is cold, right?” Viktor nods.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to go somewhere warm?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t mind. I was just thinking that we could maybe find a nice pond and skate, see how much I secretly remember. I have watched some of my competitions online and it is all vaguely familiar. Like a Deja vu type feel,” Viktor smiles. “I don’t expect to do anything widely impressive, if I can do a lap without falling that will be a miracle.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good to me. We’ll have to see what the doctor thinks,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fair,” Yuuri says. He has the book in his lap and after a moment of silence Yuuri starts talking about the characters and everything that’s going on. Viktor smiles because maybe Yuuri is getting better after all because of how natural this feels. It’s not forced, he is just talking about the book which evolves into a completely different conversation that lasts all during the waiting room period and dies only when the doctor calls them into the exam room. Yuuri did end up getting off of the crutches, but wasn’t cleared to skate. They don’t want him risking making anything worse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So about that cabin in Alaska, when do we go?” Yuuri asks, walking out of the walk-in without crutches.</span>
</p><p><span>“I’ll look at the booking schedule. I think they had an opening next week,”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Then let’s go,” Yuuri says. Viktor smiles. Viktor drops Yuuri off at the Inn an he drives to his apartment. He turns right around when he hears noises coming from the guest bedroom that make him turn right around. He did manage to get his computer and Makkachin out before he leaves and drives back to the Inn. </span></p><p>
  <span>“I thought you were back at the apartment?” Mari says when Viktor walks through the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Otabek and Yurio are there,” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh?” Viktor cocks an eyebrow “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She snorts “yeah no take your time. They came here once and oh my lord it’s going to be a while.” Viktor rolls his eyes. Yuuri is curled up in the living room under a blanket. Makkachin jumps up onto the couch and curls up right next to Yuuri who is started at the giant fur ball. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She really doesn’t know personal space, huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No she does not. She’s basically our number one fan,” Viktor says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you where at the apartment,”</span>
</p><p><span>“A friend of ours is in town with his boyfriend and…”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Oh my,” Yuuri says, knowing very well what Viktor was getting at. Viktor sits down on the arm chair adjacent to the couch Yuuri is on and he opens up his computer and looks at booking the little cabin. He shows Yuuri pictures. It has a rap around pourch, a window overlooking the water from the bedroom, a nice kitchen, close to a town but just far enough away where they are “off the grid.” It’s small and rustic but it will be nice for just the two of them. They will bring Makkachin because it’s dog friendly and everything will be fine.</span></p><p>
  <span>“We leave next week, right?” Yuuri asks. Viktor nods. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And we’ll be there for a week and a half too,” Viktor says, pulling up the forecast. “Hey, look it’s supposed to snow, it’s going to be so beautiful.” Yuuri smiles. “I can bring you to the apartment to pack some time after the rabbits are done.” Yuuri laughs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are their names?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Otabek Altin and Yuri Plisetsky. We call him Yurio, though,” Yuuri nods his head slowly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think I’ve seen then skate,” He replies “Online when I was snooping around watching my own programmes. Anyway, bummer we won’t be able to skate in Alaska.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure I can find other things for us to do,” Viktor says. He spends the afternoon looking at things to do there. He finds a load of things. Theres a lights festival, a river cruise, there are a lot of easy things they can do especially since Yuuri still has a bulky cast on his leg. The two of them, plus Makkachin all sit in a comfortable silence in the Inn. If Yuuri can’t remember being in love with Viktor, he’s going to make him fall for him all over again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>_________________________________</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re kicking me out,” Yurio says slowly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Yuuri and I are going on a vacation and I don’t want this place to be turned into a brothel,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thin walls, Yurio. Thin. Walls,” Viktor says. “Look, go back home to Russia and we can skype or something or you can rebuild what ever bridge you burned with Yakov. As much as I would love to coach you, I need to be there for my husband.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your husband who doesn’t even remember you?” Yurio says. “I know it’s harsh but c’mon, I want to compete next year and not hae Yakov day ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>I told you so Yurochka’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>In that annoying voice he does with that annoying grin on his face. Please Viktor stay,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yuuri and I are going on a vacation and I have to focus on him,”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You guys aren’t even really together. He doesn’t remember you at all,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yurio says. Viktor sighs heavily. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regardless, Yurio, I’m going on this vacation and I don’t think I’ll be able to coach you,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll pay. I know you’re not even coaching the beginner lessons,” Yurio says “You and Yuuri can come ‘vacation’ back home. Back home in Russia.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They’re very homophobic and you know it,” Viktor says. Yurio looks at the ground. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m tired of being second place to </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>him</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>,” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re not second place to Yuuri and you know it,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says not giving into the guilt tripping. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I’ll think about it when I get back, fair?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yurio nods and he and Otabek grab their bags. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I am sorry about Yuuri, Viktor,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yurio says and he and Otabek disappear down the hall. Viktor and Yuuri are leaving tomorrow and Viktor is picking up some extra things for the plane ride. Viktor is as nervous as he is excited for this vacation. He grabs what he needs and meets back up with Yuuri at the Inn. They’re going to stay there because that is where Yuuri is most comfortable. Going to the apartment and staying there is going to be a huge step since it’s more their place where as the Inn is more “his place”. Viktor isn’t sure if it entirely makes sense, but it works…. Right?</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>OOooOOoOoooO <br/>I need a vacation honestly</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Viktor helps clean up from dinner, and he walks down to the guest bedroom with Makkachin at his heels. It still stings sleeping alone. Viktor has noticed no matter how many blankets he lays under, he is still cold and shivering. Even if Makkachin is half on top of him. Maybe it’s more of a mental thing than something physical. Nevertheless, he hasn’t been sleeping. He knows Yuuri is sleeping fine because he checks on him when ever he wakes up. Even before everything, if Viktor woke up at an insane hour, he would look over at Yuuri and make sure he is sleeping fine. It was always a sort of reassurance. Viktor flicks the TV on and pays attention to some of it, but then he gets distracted and starts looking down at the gold ring on his finger. He knows inside the ring has Yuuri’s initials etched inside and he figures that is as close to his husband as he is going to get. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Getting up in the morning was miserable. He starts a coffee for himself and tea for Yuuri and some food for Makkachin who is also exhausted. Viktor tip toes into Yuuri’s room and he is sound asleep. He crouches by his bed and gently shakes him awake. His tired eyes open and he doesn’t smile like he used to when Viktor would wake him up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I have tea waiting for you out there, I figured we could get something at the airport, unless your hungry now.” Yuuri sits up and rubs the sleep from his eyes. He yawns and goes to reach for his glasses, but Viktor is one step ahead of him and already has them in his hand. Viktor helps Yuuri get into the cast on his leg that he has to take off when he sleeps. Makkachin sits out in the kitchen, waiting for them. She lifts her head and yawns loudly before stretching and sitting at Yuuri and Viktor’s feet while they drink their tea and coffee to wake up before they drive to the airport. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri grabs Makkachin’s leash and her bag of food and a few of her toys and brings it out to the car as Viktor grabs their bags. They shiver as they walk out to the car. The sun hasn’t even come up yet. The only pet friendly flight left super early, so they had to make due with waking up this early. Makkachin curls up in the backseat and is out in four minutes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You alright?” Viktor asks, seeing the borderline panicked look on Yuuri’s face as they get settled in the car. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What is it?” Viktor asks, knowing something is wrong. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just had a bad dream earlier… about the crash,” Yuuri says “Out of everything, that’s the only thing I remember vividly. The sounds, the smells, the panic, everything.” Viktor tries to push this explosion of concern down so he doesn’t overwhelm him, but he doesn’t do a very good job at it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know you don’t remember anything, but I am always here. I won’t be annoyed or mad if you wake me up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Does it happen a lot? The nightmares?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No,” Viktor replied. “But we do talk about everything. No secrets, no pushing each other away. I know it’s hard because of the amnesia and all, but it’s what we did. I get it you’re not comfortable with it, but its what we do. I know what happens when you bottle everything up and let it implode.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I get it,” Yuuri says. “I’m trying.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know you’re trying but you honestly don’t have to try hard, especially on this vacation. You don’t have to act a way because you think thats how you used to, just be the you you know how to be,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay,” Yuuri says. They lapse into a silence that is followed by Yuuri slowly drifting off to sleep. Viktor notices and at a red light, he reaches back and grabs his jacket and drapes it over Yuuri as a blanket. Yuuri’s senses go into overdrive with his scent and he doesn’t mind it. It’s the first piece of Viktor that makes him feel at home and makes him feel safe and unbothered by being in a car since there is still lingering PTSD. As he is slowly getting his memories back, he is remembering the accident, first in snap shots, and now in full blown detail. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri has a dreamless rest until they get to the airport. They get driven around the airport on a golf cart. They have a full feast for breakfast because they’re starving. By the time they get to their gate, they have to wait for half an our. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You have the biggest bags under your eyes,” Yuuri says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No I do not,” Viktor says. Yuuri laughs and nods his head. He pulls out his phone and looks. He does have huge bags under his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You intend on sleeping at all?” Yuuri asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I might on the plane ride,” Viktor replies.”You should too,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I slept on the ride here,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That wasn’t long,” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You look like you have been up all night though,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I have been,” Viktor replies. Yuuri raises his eyebrows waiting for Viktor to elaborate. </span>
</p>
<p><span>“You said we don’t keep things from each other,”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“I just haven’t been sleeping that well, nothing much,” Viktor replies. He rubs his eyes. “Besides, the bags under my eyes are Gucci.” Yuuri rolls his eyes and chuckles at him. Makkachin is taking advantage of all of the down time and takes another nap. Somehow, no one recognises them and they take their seats with extra legroom for Makkachin and for Yuuri’s leg. Viktor’s phone buzzes with a text from Mila asking about Yurio and if he left. She mentioned that she put it in terms to him as what if you where in Viktor’s shoes and Otabek didn’t remember him at all. That really snapped everything into perspective for him. Viktors mom tells him to call when they land, regardless of the time. They have always called when they landed because she gets nervous when people in her family are flying on a plane. Her best friend was in the airforce and he died in a plane crash. Now she has Viktor call every time he lands so she can rest easy and know that he is safe. His father never really cared much for his mothers antics, Viktor did. He always texted his mother when he got somewhere when he was driving and when he left so she knew where he was. When he and Yuuri were dating, Viktor brought him over to Russia and Viktor told him that story, so then Yuuri started doing it. </span></p>
<p>
  <span>Viktor texts his mother to tell her that they are on the plane and that he will call when they land. He smiles when she tells him to have a safe flight and to say Hi to Yuuri and Makkachin for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My mother says hi,” Viktor says, nudging Yuuri. He smiles, not remembering her, but still, he smiles because it’s the polite thing to do and Viktor knows it.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Viktor fell asleep on the plane ride out to Alaska. It was restless because he kept on waking up. He doesn’t know if it is the anxiety for being locked in a small house with Yuuri who still doesn’t like sleeping in the same room with him, or if it is the turbulence. Regardless, they land and Viktor can just feel the cold, even from inside of the plane. He and Yuuri bundle up in layers and he grabs their heaviest bags and they walk off of the plane. They walk over to baggage claim and then once again are packed into a golf cart and are carted to the rental car lot. Yuuri freezes when he recognises the car that they are renting. It’s the same as the one he drove in New York. The one that was crushed by the truck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You okay?” Viktor asks, loading everything up in the trunk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is the same one as New York,” Yuuri says, trying to move, but he is frozen, in more ways than one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh fuck… Here, I can go change it-” Yuuri shakes his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s-it’s fine,” Yuuri says. “It’s fine as long as I’m not driving, right?” Yuuri says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure? Like 110%?” Yuuri nods and he stiffly climbs into the passenger side. Makkachin jumps in the back, and tries to climb into Yuuri’s lap over the centre console. Viktor drives incredibly slow until they get to the house and he has never seen Yuuri scramble to get out of a car like that before. He helps Viktor bring all of the bags inside and being up and moving helps keep the anxiety of being in the same car again all amped up. Viktor wasn’t given much of a choice on what car they got, they needed something with four wheel drive to deal with the imminent snow and ice. They have a fully stocked fridge and pantries. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You alright?” Viktor asks, seeing the look in Yuuri’s eyes. He nods his head.</span>
</p><p><span>“Just a little cold, I didn’t think it was going to be this cold,” he says, trying to joke, but he is still panic ridden.</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Why don’t we make some hot cocoa,” Viktor says, opening a cabinet and seeing a huge stock of hot cocoa in a whole slue of different flavours. Yuuri nods his head and wanders around. It is a small little cabin and the heat is finally kicking in. Yuuri finds the bedroom, there is a huge bed. He sits down on it and it is comfy. There is a sliding door leading to the pourch which wraps all the way around the cabin. There is a little dock which in the summer, this place must be nice if it is right on the water. Yuuri knows there is only one bed and he doesn’t know how that is going to work. He still doesn’t like the idea of sharing a bed with him yet. He knows they’re married, but everything is still new. He walks back out into the kitchen and Viktor is finishing with the hot cocoa. </span></p><p>
  <span>“I can take the pullout couch,” Viktor says, as if he can read Yuuri’s mind. “It’ll be uncomfortable with a bum knee and your back was bothering you on the plane ride, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t mind, I have kind of pushed you into the dog house,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Yuuri, it’s fine,” He says, drinking his hot cocoa. “I once spent a month on a friends couch a pull out couch is a luxury.” He adds with a laugh. “I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted from traveling.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Absolutely wiped,” Yuuri replies. “So is Makkachin.” She is half asleep on the couch, severely jet lagged. Viktor chuckles at the sight of her. “We should put on a movie or something. I saw a little bookcase of them in the living room.” Viktor smiles behind his mug. He and Yuuri are actually going to do something together. This is going to be good. This is going to be very good, they’re going to have a nice relaxing vacation just the two of them and Makkachin, nothing can go wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They pick out a movie after hot cocoa, a cinematic masterpiece that has them both baffled to why it doesn’t have any official awards. It is none other than the amazing movie, Spaceballs. Yuuri doesn’t get all of the star wars references because he doesn’t remember watching it. Viktor explains some of the references here and there. They both end up crying on the floor from laughing so hard from all of the innuendos and the jokes and the fourth wall breaks. It truly is a masterpiece. They take a brief snack intermission to grab something more to eat and drink, sadly, there isn’t any popcorn.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There are so many good movies over there,” Yuuri says, half asleep. “Meet Dave is over there too.” He says in between yawns Viktor’s jaw drops. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my god, no way,” Yuuri nods. “Oh that is the first American movie I watched and it is just- It’s as good as Spaceballs.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We should do movie nights,” Yuuri replies. “Here and when we go back home… Do we do those?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have them every once and a while, but nothing official,” Yuuri smiles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, let’s make it official,” Yuuri says “How about at the apartment?” Viktor nods his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Deal.” Viktor plays the movie, and Yuuri ends up falling asleep with Makkachin half on top of him. He turns the TV off and slowly gets off of the couch. Makkachin wakes up and crawls off of Yuuri and onto the floor, ready to go jump up on the bed like she does when they are at home. Viktor picks Yuuri up, who he assumes is out cold. But he’s not. He is still partly awake and he knows what is going on. Viktor walks into the bedroom carrying Yuuri. He gently sets him down on the bed, and very slowly and as quietly as he can, he takes the cast off of his leg and sets it on the floor beside the bed. He pulls the blanket over Yuuri and he leans down and kisses his forehead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ya lyublyu tebya,” He says in Russian softly, before closing the curtains softly and walking out of the room, closing the door behind him. Yuuri opens his tired eyes. He knows what Viktor said to him. He doesn’t know a lot, but he knows it means I love you. He focuses and tries to remember where he has heard him say that. Maybe they where visiting Russia, or maybe he always said it to Yuuri in Russian, he doesn’t know. He knows what it means and he didn’t have to think twice about it. He knows that when Vitkor said it, he felt his heart flutter a little bit. Is he remembering how he felt towards him?</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>AWwwww shittttt</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>Yuuri waits at the intersection in front of a red light. He rubs the sleep from his eyes, and tells himself in five minutes he can go back to the hotel with Viktor and everything will be fine. He smiles when the light turns green and he double checks for any cars who are going to run the light. The coast is clear, so he goes. From his left side, he sees bright lights. He turns to see if someone has their high beams on, but no, it’s a truck barrelling towards him. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Yuuri steps on the gas to try to get away from the truck, but he doesn’t make it. On top of the sound of the truck hitting his car, he hears people screaming. Everything blacks out. He is dizzy with a raging head ache and he is trapped inside his car when he comes to. His bone is popping out of his leg, and he is covered in blood and he doesn’t even know where he is. He looks at the hood of his car, and there is a bloody, motionless body laying on the hood of his car. Yuuri screams.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri sits up right. Everything is as black as when he blacked out after the crash. The door opens and some light floods into the room, Viktor is standing in the doorframe. Makkachin pushes past Viktor and jumps up onto the bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nightmare?” Viktor asks. Yuuri nods. Viktor goes to walk into the room, but he stops. “Want some tea or…” He doesn’t know what to really offer because he knows what makes him better, is the one thing Yuuri doesn’t really want right now. Yuuri fights as hard as he can to not break down, but it doesn’t work so well. He nods his head. He sits up and lets his head fall into his hands. Viktor comes back with a mug of tea and hands it to Yuuri. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you want me to stay here or….”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think I’m fine, it was just a bad dream,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You where yelling,” Viktor replies. “I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Yuuri sips his tea.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m okay,” He says, willing himself to calm down. “Thank you.” Viktor hesitates before leaving the room. Neither falls asleep. Yuuri stays in the big, empty bed staring up at the ceiling and Viktor mindlessly scrolls through his phone. He has a message from JJ asking if the whole lot of them wanted to meet up and hang but Viktor told him no. Not because JJ, even since they have gotten married, still flirts with Yuuri. Sometimes it’s playful, other times not so much. He doesn’t want Yuuri to be overwhelmed by him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Oh the flip side, Viktor is overwhelmed by how alone he feels. Yes, he has people around him, but the only one that ever really mattered was Yuuri. He doesn’t have him anymore. He knew it was going to be hard but he didn’t think it would last this long. He turns the TV on and finds a rerun of Gilmore Girls and watches that. The cheesy comedy is comforting and the whole dynamic of the town is comforting. His phone buzzes with a call from his mother which makes him smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I hope I’m not calling late,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t worry, the jet lag is keeping me from sleeping,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He says. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“How is everything?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good, good. Your father is still the same, I started coaching ballet again, my hip has gotten better. Yurochka said you’re in Alaska with Yuuri on a vacation… I take it everything is getting better,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yes and no,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor replies</span>
  <em>
    <span>. “We’re getting there… slowly but surely.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hasn’t remembered anything new?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Nope. We’re on vacation, we’re relaxing and not worrying about any of that stuff right now.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Vitya, your husband doesn’t remember you, I don’t even need to look at your face to tell you are breaking inside and you are just putting up a front for everyone else. You been sleeping?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Not so much,” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Eating?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yes,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Taking care of </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>yourself</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>. I know Yuuri needs you but you also need you too,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I don’t want to pour more onto you, but maybe coming home would be nice. You’re stretching yourself so thin. I’m going to hang up and you’re going to sleep.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He smiles and nods his head. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I love you,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I love you too,” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good night,” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good afternoon,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She laughs and they hang up. Viktor doesn’t know if he falls asleep or just blacks out until the morning. He puts the couch back together and has everything picked up by the time he hears Yuuri stirring around in the bedroom. He walks over to the kitchen that isn’t as fully stocked as he thought it was last night. There are boxes of granola bars and hot cocoa, but there isn’t really anything to make a real meal. He stands in the kitchen, trying to decide if he wants to go to Yuuri and ask him if he wants to go with him or just text him and ask. He decides he should just wait for Yuuri to wake up and come out of he room, but he doesn’t. Viktor goes to text him, but he sees Yuuri’s phone is on the side table next to the couch where he was sitting.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He walks to Yuuri’s room and sees him curled up in a tight ball. He knows better than anyone that he is drowning. Viktor forgets about breakfast and he crawls onto the bed with Yuuri. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? What are you-?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re drowning in your own anxiety. Un able to get out of bed, not motivated to do anything, let me help. I know how to make it better,” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re going to implode if you keep everything bottled up, Yuuri. I’ve seen it happen,” Viktor says, his voice soft. “You’re the most important person to me and it tears me apart to see you hurting and newly dealing with your anxiety.” Yuuri is quiet for a long moment</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How do I make it stop?” He asks, his voice frail.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come here,” Viktor says, getting under the covers and gently pulling Yuuri close. Yuuri doesn’t know if it is out of some instinct that is locked inside of his head, but he buries his face into Viktor’s chest and he drapes an arm over his waist without thinking twice about it. It’s pure muscle memory. He feels all of the tension he sees in Viktor’s body losen. Yuuri is soon crushed by how this all must feel from Viktor’s side. He doesn’t know how Viktor knows Yuuri is being crushed by something else, but he does.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s going to be alright,” Viktor’s voice is barely above a whisper. He gently tightens his grip around Yuuri. “I’ve got you, it’s going to be alright.” Yuuri sinks into his words and lets them wrap around him. He believes Viktor when he says that. There is something calming about his Russian accent when he tells Yuuri everything is going to be alright. Makkachin doesn’t do a good job of hiding her excitement that her two favourite people in the world are finally in the same room together. She lays behind Yuuri, with her head resting on his hip because she knows she’s not going to worm her way in between them this time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly, Yuuri feels the weight of his anxiety break away. He drifts in and out of sleep. He wakes up to Viktor sitting up and on the phone ordering food. Yuuri blinks and Viktor is walking in the room with plates with food on them, with Makkachin at his feet, wanting scraps. Yuuri slowly sits up and takes the plate. They eat in silence and when they’re done, Viktor takes the plates and disappears into the kitchen with them. He comes back into the room and lays down on the bed with Yuuri. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Better?” Viktor asks, his voice is soft. Yuuri nods his head. He pushes closer to Viktor and he is soon wrapped up in his arms. He falls back asleep and has another dream. Not a bad one, per say, but one of him and Viktor skating. They where talking about something and they where laughing so hard they both where laying down on the ice in pools of their own laughter. Is he slowly remembering things? Deep down does he know that when ever Viktor is close he’s no going to have bad dreams or anxiety that is crushing him to the point where he can barely sit up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Does this happen a lot?” Yuuri whispers.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not a lot, but sometimes,” he whispers back. “Let me know if you are up for anything else. I don’t mind just staying here for the rest od the day, but if you want to get out and go do something, there is a little carnival thing down the street.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you,” Yuuri says. He doesn’t feel the same awkwardness he felt around him anymore.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>As expected, Yuuri felt better and was sick of being home, so he and Viktor bundled up and started walking down the driveway. It’s late afternoon, and it’s starting to get dark. A few hours ago it started snowing and everything is coated in a layer of snow which sparkles even in the dimming light. Yuuri smiles softly. They walk until they get to the town which is glowing with lights covering every little shop. There are little carriages, selling hot cocoa like hot dog stands in Times Square. There’s a little walk through the woods thats lit up with lights of so many colours thats synchronised with music that is playing from speakers attached to very aesthetically pleasing lamp posts. Yuuri and Viktor are in awe as they take everything in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why didn’t we come here sooner?” Yuuri asks. Viktor shrugs his shoulders. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t know it existed. I mean, yeah I heard stories and seen pictures from a friend of ours. It’s like the grand canyon, photos and stories do not do a justice,” Viktor says. He looks over at Yuuri, who is partially listening and more mesmerized by everything to pay attention to what Viktor is saying. They stop for hot cocoa as everything is starting to get darker and they walk through the town, popping in and out of shops for warmth and to find souvenirs. Makkachin is trotting happily beside them, enjoying the people who stop and pet her. They eat out for dinner, lapsing into a conversation about the people they saw and their favourite moments from the night. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For hours, they both forget the accident, they both forget Yuuri’s amnesia. They forget this void between the two of them as they walk around this little town. Of course, since they’re out and about, they stop at a grocery store and get some food for meals tomorrow and they take a cab home. Unpacking all of he things they bought was just as fun as the rest of the night. Viktor figured out how to bluetooth his phone to the speaker in the kitchen and they played music as loud as they wanted to and danced. All of the songs are their favourites. In the midst of their dancing and putting groceries away - though they where mainly dancing, Viktor notices Yuuri is singing to the lyrics. He stops the music and Yuuri looks to him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know this song,” He says “Like you’re singing it” Yuuri’s eyes go wide. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I remember the song!” He says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You remember the song!” They jump up and down in excitement as Viktor turns the music back on and louder and they both yell the lyrics. Makkachin jumps up, putting her paws on Viktor’s chest and Yuuri laughs as he watches the two of them “Dance” He feels his heart swell with something he’s never felt before, but he has a nostalgic feeling deep in his bones. He knows he’s remembering everything. Slowly but surely, everything is going to be fine between them. After putting everything away, they flop onto the bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Movie morning?” Yuuri suggests. Viktor laughs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Deal,” Without even thinking twice about it he pulls the covers back and gets under the covers. Makkachin jumps in between them. Neither Viktor or Yuuri really notice they are both in the bed together until Viktor gets up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can stay if you want,” Yuuri says, groggily.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You sure?” Viktor asks. Yuuri nods his head and holds up the covers, smiling at the giddy look on his face. He becomes wrapped up in Yuuri’s arms and finds himself suddenly unable to fall asleep because he and Yuuri have finally gotten to a point now were they are cuddling. They went from Yuuri seeing right through Viktor to him acknowledging that they are married and they are laying together</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>On their third night there, during dinner, they watched the northern lights. They bundled up under jackets, hats, gloves and scarves and looked up at the sky. Viktor goes back inside and grabs the extra duvet cover he used when he was sleeping on the couch. He wraps it around his shoulders, and then brings Yuuri close, wrapping them both in the blanket. Yuuri leans back against Viktor and they stand there in awe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We should definitely come back here,” Yuuri says, looking up at him. Viktor smiles and nods his head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If it means more of this, yes,” Viktor replies. Packing to go back to Japan is bittersweet. They make sure all of their souvenirs are safe in their bags and they head for the airport around noon time the following day. Yuuri looks physically unbothered by the fact of being in the same car make and model as the one in New York, but Viktor knows deep down he his heart is racing and he is trying to look fine because this vacation of theirs was relaxing and he wants it to stay this way. He debates asking Viktor if he wouldn’t mind if he moved back into the apartment. He obviously knows Viktor wouldn’t mind, but still, he feels like he has to ask. Even if he knows Viktor will tell him that it is his home too and he can come home whenever he wants. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuko picks them up at the airport, and made sure to have an escape route for them to avoid the tabloids - which was easier than expected. Out of habit, she drops them off at the apartment, and they flop on the couch, not bothering to unpack their bags. Makkachin as always jumps up between them, and sprawls out over her two favourite humans in the entire world. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Take out?” Viktor asks, pulling his phone out of his pocket. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes please,” He replies. Viktor picks up the phone and calls their favourite take out place.  “Ooh, can you get an order of Yakitori please?” Yuuri asks. Vitor smiles and nods his head. He orders the Yakitori for Yuuri and says he’ll be over in a few to pick it up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s your favourite,” Viktor says</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, aside from Katsudon,” they laugh.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Ah Sorry this chapter is a little shorter that what they normally are, I was faced with extreme writers block ;/</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It’s well awaited for, the day when Yuuri gets medically cleared to skate. He had some moments where he knew what he was doing because of muscle memory, but then there were other things he completely forgot. He remembers the names of the jumps and some of the spins, just not how to do them. A lot of the muscle memory is there, but at the same time it’s not. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re just going to have fun, no pressure of memorizing programmes or making sure everything is perfect,” Viktor says. “If you can’t get something within the first few tries don’t get down on yourself, okay?” He steps onto the ice and holds his hand out for Yuuri. Yuuko isn’t letting anyone into the rink and has made sure there isn’t anyone trying to sneak in. Since the crash, they have been super private and it is making the media pissed. The fans get it - most of them do anyway. All of their friends who regularly check in have been borderline harassed about people. Nevertheless, there is no way for any media to get into the rink right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yuuri takes Viktor’s hand and he hesitantly steps onto the ice. He sees the smile on Viktor’s face and it’s reassuring enough for him to take the first step. It is relatively easy and not as daunting as Yuuri thought it was going to be. He and Viktor take two very slow laps around the rink before he walks him through the edge work warm ups. Yes, Yuuri stumbles over his own feet here and there, but here he is. He is skating. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to do jumps first or spins?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Which one is easier?” Yuuri asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They’re about the same,” Viktor says. Yuuri goes with jumps and they start off with the smallest jumps there are and then they work their way up to a waltz jump.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This feels familiar,” Yuuri says. “Waltz loop. That’s an axel in its basic form, right?” Viktor nods his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you remember how to do it?” Viktor asks. Yuuri furrows his eyebrows, trying to remember how the jump combo. Viktor walks him through everything though steps and turns without jumping. It’s how Yakov taught him - walk through everything first without jumping and then try the jump. Yuuri’s waltz jump was a tiny bit shaky but he got it and then froze on the part with the loop. Viktor tells him not to worry about it and they will try a different jump instead of a waltz loop. In an hour, they get all of the basic jumps down, waltz jump to a lutz, no axel, and then they move over to spins. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“With spins you have to make sure your shoulders are square and that you’re not leaning back because you’ll fall and it’s not comfortable. We’re just starting with two foot spins from pivots, nothing fancy.” His two foot spin isn’t centred, and he is leaning ot the right more than standing up right, it is a start. They skate for another hour before they decide to go home. Yuuri takes an epsom salt bath while Viktor cooks a small post-skating snack for them. He sets it out on plates and goes to walk it upstairs to the bathroom, but he figures Yuuri wouldn’t want him walking in since he’s relearning all of their routines. He sets Yuuri’s plate on the dining table and Viktor sits where he normally sits. He sets his computer out, going through his emails. It’s flooded with people asking for an interview on Yuuri’s state. It’s been months and people are still asking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Viktor deletes all of them because until he gets the okay from Yuuri, he isn’t going to go out and tell everyone about Yuuri’s state. In the span of five minutes, he has been spammed to hell with emails. Being completely fed up with everything, he decides he’s going to draft a statement that he knows will go worldwide in an hour. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>____________________________________________________________________</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Beka, look,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Yuri says, stopping flipping through all of the channels on the TV in an effort to find something to watch. He is on the news station and there is a picture of Viktor and Yuuri on the screen in the corner while the news anchor starts talking about them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Did they do an interview bout the crash?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” he asks sitting down next to Yuri shrugs his shoulders and tucks his blonde hair behind his ears and turns up the volume. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“As of thirty minutes ago we have received out first statement from Figure Skater Viktor Nikiforov regarding the Crash Yuuri Katsuki was in.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Yuri scowls at the fact that they’re not really accepting the fact that they are married and that they both hyphened their last names. Still, the news anchor goes on </span>
  <em>
    <span>“He says, ‘Thank you all for sending good thoughts our way, it is greatly appreciated. We hope to return to the ice and the public eye at the beginning of the skating season next year, while nothing is set in stone yet, those are our hopes. We would appreciate the upmost privacy during Yuuri’s recovery process. We understand people wanting to know if we’re okay, but on the other side, sifting through 800 emails every day asking for an interview is ridiculous. That being said, we will come forth with what ever exclusive the public is demanding when we are ready. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“We hope all of you are well and that you respect our wishes in remaining radio silent and out of the public’s eye until Yuuri is fully recovered. Thank you, Viktor and Yuuri Katsuki-Nikiforov.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She drones on about the details from the crash but Yuri doesn’t pay attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“They wanted a statement from him and it looks like they got it,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Otabek replies, chuckling. Yuri takes a picture of the headline and sends it to Viktor with a thumbs up emoji.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I’ve seen him mad but passive aggressively sending a letter like this to the media is a new type of mad,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Yuri says. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry this chapter is super late. I had a million assignments for school and a drs. app, but I hope you enjoyed this chapter even though it's late and short</p><p>XOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It’s been weeks since Yuuri has gotten back on the ice. He slowly but surely has landed all of his single jumps and they took out the harness for an axel because Viktor doesn’t want Yuuri to fall. They took a week off because Yuuri fell and his knee swelled up. The doctor said it was normal for it to swell, but Viktor still panicked. Somehow, Yuuri coaxed Viktor into not using the harness because falling is apart of the sport. Yuuri goes through his warm up and Viktor watches. Yuuko comes into the rink to watch as well. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How are you guys?” She asks in a hushed voice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re doing alright,” Viktor says “He hasn’t remembered anything new, but ee can make new memories.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Like a new wedding? If your mother hears about that she will try to bring you to Russia for the wedding,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, she would. I love her to death, but Russia isn’t a safe place for Yuuri and I. She wants it to be and says that Yuuri and I can make it a safer place, but I don’t think we can. I don’t want anything to happen to him or add any more stress on him. If we were to go what am I going to tell him ‘the country that raised me hates our relationship and many others like us have been killed because of who we love so why not go spend a weekend there with my parents where my dad could quiet literally care less about what could potentially happen to us.’ No, I really don’t want to bring him there.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You miss the Yuuri that has his memory. He was as much your rock as you are his,” Yuuko says. “I know it’s hard, Viktor, I know. Has he asked much about everything?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not really, I don’t want him forcing himself to act a certain way because that’s how he acted before. I still love him, with every inch of my being. If he loves me the same, we can work through it, right?” Yuuko nods. Yuuri finishes up his warm up and Viktor steps on the ice and they go through all of his jumps. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You need more knee bend on the loop,” Viktor says. “You’re whipping yourself into the jump. The rotation will come easy, you just need the height,” Yuuri nods his head and goes again. His knee gives and he falls on the landing. He is quick to tell Viktor that he is fine and that it happens and it’s nothing he needs to be worried about. He does the loop again and everything is fine. The take off is perfect, the landing is fine. Viktor isn’t moving him up to doubles today, and despite protest from Yuuri he issn’t budging on this. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t bubble wrap me Viktor. I’m going to fall and it may be nasy and it may not be but it is part of the sport. You can’t tell me that you never had a nasty fall and Yakov bubble wrapped you,” He says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You remember Yakov? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He was your coach, right? Back in Russia,” Viktor nods. “Did he ever bubble wrap you if you fell? No he didn’t so you don’t need to bubble wrap me.” </span>
</p>
<p><span>“But I wasn’t in a car crash and out for the whole season with amnesia.”</span><span><br/>
</span> <span>“I’m relearning everything, slowly but surely, everything is slowly coming back. I have to learn some how, I’ll be fine. A little bruised, but it’s fine! I will be fine. We are going to move to doubles because if I want to be back on par with the other skaters next season, we have to start somewhere and here is the place.” Viktor reluctantly agrees. Yuuri is right, Yakov never bubble wrapped him. If anything he condoned the ice and concrete being the only thing that caught him when he was doing on ice and off ice run throughs of his jumps. </span></p>
<p>
  <span>He watches hesitantly everytime Yuuri’s landings are too low and when Yuuri himself winces as he stands up from a sit spin. Viktor is ready to call the lesson in early but Yuuri keeps on skating and working on everything as if a mile run this morning and now all of this strenuous work isn’t enough. Yuuri doesn’t even ask Viktor before he starts doing doubles again. It feels odd to him, the fact that he doesn’t have to give it much thought before he is already in the air. His brain knows how to do it all and it’s bizarre. He knows Viktor is a little annoyed he did a double salchow before they even talked about it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t jump in the corners, not only is it hard for the judges sometimes to see you, but it’s not good to jump and then potentially fall and be right next to the boards. I speak from experience,” Viktor says, knowing he would have covered that with him if Yuuri had asked about the doubles before just going and doing them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think I can do triples,” Yuuri half jokes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I have no doubt in my mind that you can do them, but how about not today, fair?” Yuuri sighs. “We’ll do two more doubles, a sal and then a loop and we’ll call it a day.” Yuuri nods, wanting to skate more. His knee throbs when he lands the double loop and he doesn’t have time to even say anything before Viktor is already asking Yuuko for an ice pack as Yuuri limps over to the boards. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Call it a day early?” he nods. “We should check with your P.T. and see if you are moving too fast for skating right now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He’s going to just tell me to turn to my coach,” Yuuri says, grabbing his skate guards. “So coach, what do you think?” He asks with a playful tone that brings back so much nostalgia for Viktor. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think we should take it easy,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought we were already doing that,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Then we’re going to go easier, cut back on the morning run and stay off doing a lot of doubles and sits,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But those are fun!,” Yuuri complains as they walk to the locker room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, I know. But until your knee is better and isn’t swelling or throbbing as much, it’s the easiest and safest thing to do right now.” Yuuri agrees, but deep down, he doesn’t care. He’s having the whole “love at first skate” moment where he wants to jump at every chance he gets to go out and skate. He has a quote swirling around in his head that Viktor must have said to him: “These new skaters are on ice-crack. They’re junkies for ice time and they will do anything to go out an skate.” It’s true. Yuuri slowly makes his way to the car wanting to stay longer. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You got your hands on the ice-crack, huh?” Viktor asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was just thinking about that,” Yuuri replies. Viktor laughs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Junkie,” He nudges him and they drive home. As Yuuri showers upstairs, Viktor gets on with making a ritualistic after-skate snack. Which this time around he heard about a rice krispie recipe that he just had to make. Everything is going good between them. They watch movies every other night, They have dance parties when they do the dishes, laundry or when they do the dishes. They share the same bed. But one could argue that they just come across as friends. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Yuuri keeps a list on his phone. It’s not a grocery list or a list of chores. It’s a list of things he remembers and a list of things he is trying desperately to remember. Viktor started going back to coach at the rink for the other little skaters once he was sure Yuuri could get around the apartment by himself and when he had enough of his memory back where he would be fine. He has gone on a lot of walks around the city, making sure he is wearing a hat and some sunglasses so people don’t recognise him right off of the bat. He hasn't been stopped yet, but it’s better to be safe than sorry. He visits his parents at the Inn and has lunch with them since Viktor’s lesson starts at noon. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom thinks the solution to all of your problems is going to soak in the hot springs. There aren’t any competitions near by so it’s pretty dead here. No one is in the springs. Plus, I could close it off for ‘cleaning’.” Mari says. Yuuri nods his head and walks to his room and grabs his towel. He walks to the springs and goes to the outdoor one because it’s supposed to snow. The warm water feels nice after all of the skating he did yesterday. They did a little today, but not as much as either of them would have wanted. Yuuri relaxes and lets his eyes close. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“The Russian skater you love is in the spring,” Mari says, Yuuri’s eyes go wide.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“He- He’s here? How?” Yuuri asks, feeling his heart going a mile a minute. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Apparently Yuuko’s girls recorded you skating to Viktor’s short programme and they posted it on the internet. Yuuri it’s everywhere! All anyone can talk about is you,” Yuuri doesn’t know if he is going to have a nervous break down over the fact that figuratively he fell flat on his face last season and Yuri Plisetsky said he should retire (and Yuuri is considering it) or be excited that his Idol is here and watched his skating. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe he is here to tell me how I did everything wrong </span>
  <em>
    <span>Yuuri thinks to himself. His feet act before his brain stops him from moving. He runs to the hot springs and sure enough, there he is. Eyes bluer than anything Yuuri has ever seen. Platinum coloured hair. It’s without a doubt Viktor Nikiforov. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You must be Yuuri Katsuki,” He says, looking Yuuri up and down. Yuuri’s face heats up. His accent is thick and it’s kind of hard to understand him clearly, yet Yuuri leans into everything he says. “I saw you skating to one of my programmes and I’m very flattered. It was amazing. I also heard you are going to retire from skating. You’re not that old I bet I could squeeze a few more season out of you.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What- What do you mean?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I mean, I am going to be your coach,” Viktor says with a smile. Yuuri is floored and confused. What in the hell could have prompted this?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Yuuri wakes up to the sliding door closing. Viktor is walking over to the springs. He rolls up his pants and he just dips his feet in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think… I think I just remembered how we met,” Yuuri says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?” Yuuri notices his accent isn’t as thick as it was in his dream. “Wait, which time?” </span>
</p><p><span>“Here… What do you mean ‘which time’?”</span><span><br/></span> <span>Viktor chuckles nervously. “Well… At the barcelona banquet the year before I flew out here to coach you. You got absolutely sloshed. Everyone did, honestly. You and Christophe started pole dancing. It was beautiful really, and you where walking like bambi and you asked me to be your coach. Fast forward a little bit, I couldn’t get you out of my head but I was dumb and didn’t remember what your name was because I as well was drunk. I saw your redition of one of my programmes and then I met sober you here.” Yuuri looks as if he is going to die from embarrassment. </span></p><p>
  <span>“I pole danced?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yup. I still have the pictures and everything. Christophe tried to get you to do it again at our wedding but our families where there and you promised not to be completely sloshed again because getting on a plane, hung over, to go to a different time zone for out honeymoon isn’t the best idea.” Yuuri laughs. “I speak from experience.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“About being hung over or the honeymoon,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Being hung over,” Viktor replies. “One season, Christophe and I where celebrating… something. I got so drunk I don’t even remember what we were celebrating, but the next morning we were to get on a plane and fly to Canada for a competition. Which we were all so fucked that we were throwing up all over the place and we didn’t know what time it was. Nevertheless, I’ve learned how to hold in my vomit while I’m skating which isn’t a skill I’m very proud of.” Yuuri laughs harder than he has ever before. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I kind of remember having a neck tie around my head,” Yuuri says as fragments of memories start floating back to the front of his mind. Viktor smiles and pulls out his phone and scrolls back in his photos for what seems like ever before he comes across those photos. Of the Barcelona Banquet. Yuuri’s face gets red with embarrassment as he watches the videos and looks at the pictures. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t be embarrassed, it was very seductive,” Viktor says, which makes Yuuri’s face get even redder. “We based your short programme off of this night,” Viktor goes into the whole story of their first skating season together. “Even then, I still wanted to bubble wrap you and I would feel my heart sink at every fall. It’s not something new. It may be magnified now because of everything, but, I’ve always been this way. I’m the same way with the little learn-to-skaters.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re just very protective,” Yuuri says, “it’s why we haven’t gone to Russia to see your parents.” Viktor freezes. “Yuuko is terrible about secrets. Just as bad as the triplets.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was-”</span>
</p><p><span>“Trying to make the world seem less scary to your husband who has amnesia and is seeing everything again for the first time. I get it, Viktor. I would probably do the same thing if I was in your shoes.”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“I wish it was different. My dad doesn’t like my mom travelling because he doesn’t like the idea that I’m married to a man. My mom loves you probably more than me,” He jokes. “Seriously, I didn’t want to bring you over there and have to tell you that it’s dangerous for us to be there. I didn’t want you to freak out-”</span></p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to justify it to me, Viktor,” Yuuri says, reaching for his hand. “You didn’t think it was safe and you made a call and it’s the right call to make. I know you want to see her and visit your family but it’s dangerous for us to be there as we are.” Viktor looks at him with sad eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wish it was different over there,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Me too,” Yuuri replies. They sit in silence for a moment before Yuuri says they should stay here for lunch and lay low for a little bit</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Not me completely forgetting to upload this chapter and remembering at 23:54..... <br/>I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter and sorry for it being so late!!!</p><p>XOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>With enough coaxing, Yuuri was finally let to be skating at what his full potential was before the crash. He skates as he once did before and oen look at them and they look normal. Yuuri’s mental health has its moments, and those days are hard because Yuuri isn’t used to them as he was. He doesn’t know how to take care of himself or ask for help like he was able to before. He isn’t used to completely shutting down, but when he does, Viktor is always right by his side, never leaving. Just like when they went to Alaska. He’s found that skating helps. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And sweets. Viktor warned him about how easily he gains weight. They go on walks instead of runs and training is a lot lighter. They started trying some memory therapies that help with memory loss patients and working over some of the lingering trauma. Yuuri, nearly half a year later, still hasn’t driven a car. He is more than capable to, but he hasn’t. He says being in the passenger side and actually sitting behind the wheel are two very different things. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He knows everything that he does and doesn’t do weights heavily on Viktor. He knows that there is possibly a million different things they could be doing instead of keeping his mental health monitored as if he is a child handling everything for the first time. Viktor’s mother is very persistent about them coming and visiting. Viktor suggested that she come here, but it was a failed attempted because his father was in the room and muttered something that rewarded a death glare from his mother. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What if we hung out with Yurio and Otabek?” Yuuri suggests one day as they are lacing up their skates. It’s a light day, they’re not going to do much since Yuuri is still groggy from a sleepless night. “Surely we will be safe around them? Or if we just keep going out there on the down low.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I just don’t think it is a good idea regardless. I read that last week someone was found dead in their home. They say it was a suicide but there are secret news stations out there that say otherwise. It’s something I don’t want to drag you into it,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And if I wasn’t in a car accident and had amnesia would you take me?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not even if I was absolutely sloshed. It’s not safe for us there. The only reason they don’t say anything about Yurio is because he is the prodigy child of Russia. He is going to take them to the olympics and what not. But Otabek is free game. I may be protected by how powerful my influence on the country is, but you’re free game. I’m not putting you in that place, especially if we’re going to be in my childhood home and my father is going to be there. I wish it were different. I really, really do.” Yuuri sighs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mom had invited us to the Inn for dinner, they’re cooking dumplings,” His tone is a little bit sharper than he intends. Viktor brushes it off and Yuuri walks out onto the ice before Viktor so he get started with the warm-up. Vitkor wants to tell him to go easy on the jumps, but he knows he won’t. The lesson goes as planned, nothing too strenuous. Some edge work, a few jumps, some spins, mainly footwork and step sequences. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“When can I relearn the programmes?” Yuuri asks, getting some water. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Soon,” Viktor replies. “I want to be sure that you really have the ice beneath your feet before we start doing that. I don’t mean that you’re falling too much-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You just want to make sure I have all of the confidence in the world,” Yuuri says. “I get it.” Yuuri puts his waterbottle back on the boards and goes back to working on his elements. Triple Axels are completely off of the table, even though that one time when Vitkor wasn’t looking he landed it perfectly. He is physically sound, aside from some exhaustion. He has landed all of his jumps today and everything has been fine, so why not try a triple Axel? He has been rewatching his old programmes again and he has landed them perfectly. Yeah he may not remember things he should about his life with Viktor, but he remembers the triple Axel. Yuuko comes into the Rink and her and Viktor start talking and he has his back turned to Yuuri so why not? This is the perfect time. Maybe if Yuuri shows that he can do it, Viktor would be less protective over him, right? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He sets up and without a second thought throws everything he has into the jump.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Music is swelling in the cold arena, though the adrenaline coursing through his body doesn’t give him the time to feel the chill. He was finishing up his step sequence. Next his his axel, it’s the last big element in the entire programme. He has a spin after than and then his skate is over. He knows when he gets off of the ice, Viktor is going to have a million and four things to tell him. Which jumps where over rotated, how his lutz was more of a flutz. How he should of held onto the spins longer, etc, etc. Nevertheless, through all of he critique, he knows Viktor is proud of him and he is only this way because he cares and wants to see him succeed. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s why he has him on a strict diet and exercising routine, so he is the healthiest he can be. He knows there are some people on line saying that Viktor is toxic for having so much control over Yuuri’s life but they don’t know even a fraction of what goes on off ice. He brought structure and balance to Yuuri’s life-</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A sound so common to figure skaters fills the rink. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>-One of the reasons why they are keeping their engagement to themselves is while there are going to be a lot of people that are supportive of them, there are a lot of people who are not.-</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yuuri?!” Viktor yells as he sees him laying on the ice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-</span>
  <em>
    <span>His axel is perfect. He knows it’s perfect because he catches Viktor’s eye who is celebrating. He smiles widely at his fiance. Just thinking of him as his fiance makes him smile even more.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>When he finishes his routine he is met with a warm, tight hug, seeing as the cold has finally numbed the tip of his nose, and his ears. His face is pink from the cold and from Viktor showering him in compliments as they make it to the Kiss and Cry. He is in not only the last group, but he is the last to skate and he landed solidly in second place. Yeah, it’s no first place, but they celebrate like it was first because nothing, nothing can drag either of them down right now. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>The podium was amazing as he and Phichit both hold a hand out to Yurio, congratulating him on first and his senior debut. Phichit and Yuuri both try not to laugh as Yurio is confused to why Yuuri of all people is being so nice to him after he has given him so much shit for no reason </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s hard not to cause a commotion and a gathering around the rink when there is an ambulance pulling up to Yuuri Katsuki’s home rink. Viktor tries his best not to freak out, but it’s not working as Yuuko yells at people to move out of the way. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I should have held onto that spin a little longer,” Yuuri says when they get to the Hotel they’re staying at. Viktor rolls his eyes. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“You did amazing. First or second, or seventh. You did amazing,” Viktor says, kissing him sweetly. “How about we stay here a little bit longer,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Or maybe fly out to visit your parents,” Yuuri says. “They’re going to find out we’re engaged sooner or later, Vitya. Might as well tell them instead of them finding out from the news as they did when we started dating.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p><em><span>“It’s not safe-”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“I know it’s not safe,” Yuuri says, holding Viktor’s hands. “We could find a place where it is safe? Hmm? I mean we could always call them but we should be there in person and celebrate with your mother at least. She has always talked about your wedding.”</span></em></p>
<p><em><span>“Yeah because she thought I was straight,”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“Yes, and she hasn’t said anything negative about us, only your father, so that’s something. They’re as much my family as they are yours. Besides, we’re only ever in Russia for competitions and it’s been a while since we’ve just walked around the streets. The plane ride is only a few hours. We could stay a few days, walk around, see the sights, hang out with your mother, impress her with my Russian.” </span></em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s the same nightmare all over again,” Viktor says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“At worst, Viktor, they said he has a minor concussion. You can’t look at me and tell me that you didn’t try a triple axel before Yakov gave you the go ahead,”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I never fell this bad and knocked myself out doing so,” Vitkor says, unable to sit because of how anxious he is, but unable to stand because his legs feel like jelly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em><span>“You are kind of convincing,” Viktor says. “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something bad happened to you over there.”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“Nothing bad will happen, okay?” Yuuri says, moving his hands up to cup Viktor’s face. “On the small chance that something does happen, there will be hell to pay and your mother is as vengeful as they come so I’m not too worried about not getting revenge or justice.” Viktor laughs softly. “If you really really don’t want to go, we don’t have to, but I’m just saying that it would be nice.”</span></em><em><span><br/></span></em> <em><span>“It would be, if I’m being honest,” Yuuri smiles and kisses his cheek. “I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausting. Coaching is an exhausting job,”</span></em></p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh yes,” Yuuri says sarcastically. “If only you were doing all of the heavy lifting of actually skating.” The two make their way into the bedroom and wrap themselves up in one another’s arms. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s just a minor concussion,” Yuuko translates for Viktor. “He just knocked himself out, it’s fine. It happens. They say he would have been fine if we brought him home, but it was smart to bring him in.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What about his memory? This can’t just be one whole reset button on all of our hard work,” Viktor waits anxiously as Yuuko talks to the doctor. Viktor’s in such a panicked state he can’t even begin to translate what the doctor is saying. Sometimes he can, but not not.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They will know more when Yuuri wakes up,” Yuuko says. “I know it’s hard, Viktor, but everything is fine, they said it wasn’t that bad and we can bring him home later tonight. I don’t mind staying at the loft with you guys if you need a little emotional support,”</span>
</p>
<p><span>“Me? Yuuri is the one-”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“You’re the one who looks like you haven’t stopped going since he woke up in New York with no memory. Everything is going to be fine. I’m here for you guys, okay?” </span></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“</span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>The venue is absolutely beautiful” </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>Viktor’s mother exclaims. Viktor and Yuuri aren’t even surprised that Viktor’s dad isn’t here. They all expected him to be a no show and despite his mother apologising profusely, Viktor and Yuuri ideally only wanted people who supported them to be there. Viktor’s mother makes her way over to Yuuri’s parents who have not stopped crying for joy at how happy Yuuri looks and how beautiful everything is. Phichit is talking with Yuuri’s parents about how he coordinated their entire honeymoon and was going in detail about everything. Yuuri and Viktor played translator for their parents so they could talk. Viktor and Yuuri got called away for the best man speeches. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“It’s true what they say about love at first sight,” Phichit says “I believe Yuuri found that…. When he met me in Detroit,” Everyone laughs, “Yuuri is special because he found it twice, once, of course with yours truly who is absolutely amazing and then with Viktor. There isn’t an obstacle these two can’t over come. Through thick and thin these two do not quit. Especially when they are trying to figure out whose night it is to do the dishes-”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Yuuri is just waking up when Viktor and Yuuko walk into the room. He rubs his eyes and Viktor prepares for the worst.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“- Being queer and in the public eye is never without it’s struggles. The name calling, the hate, all of the ugly that surrounds it. But they have replaces so much of that ugliness with so much love and light and beauty. As the captain of the Viktuuri ship, I can say I can finally retire. My job as match maker is over, and I’m passing the torch over to Viktor for being Yuuri’s one true love. It’s bitter sweet, I will say.” They laugh and clap. Christophe goes on about how much he wishes they would let him bring poles so they could all pole dance, but there are children here. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>The rest of the night goes as planned, there is cake, wine, vodka of course, and dancing not pole dancing, but there is a lot of dancing. Yuuri and Viktor take the tripples out to the dance flor and swing them around, Phichit cuts in to Viktor and Yuuri’s dance to dance with Yuuri. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“You did it,” He says, beaming. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I did,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re gonna miss simping for me,” Phichit says, the two laugh. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Have fun in Shipping Retirement,”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh sweety, a Shippers job is never done,” He says, nodding over towards Otabek and Yurio who are eating the last bits of cake in competition, though everyone knows Yurio is going to win because he has a stronger stomach than Otabek. “Those two are next, you can bet on it.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, love,” Viktor says softly, as he sits on the edge of Yuuri’s bed. He looks around the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Am I in the hospital?” he asks. Viktor nods. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, we were skating and you did a triple Axel and fell. You knocked yourself out,” Viktor says. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh,” Yuuri says. “Like the time we tried learning from those L.A. kids how to skateboard and you fell and nearly knocked yourself out.” Viktor’s eyes go wide. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>AH I'm sorry this is late! I have been feeling a little foggy lately, but I next week I'm going to be more on time. I made sure this chapter is super long to try to make up for the fact that this is a day late!!!!</p>
<p>I hope you had a Holiday and I hope the 2021 brings you all so much joy to counter act this past year. Ain't no one going to be writing 2020 on their school papers anymore. </p>
<p>Thank you guys for reading this chapter! Stay healthy and well!!!!<br/>XOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“You remember?” Viktor asks. Yuuri nods his head. “W-What do you remember?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everything,” Yuuri says. “Growing up, how we met, when we were dating, the wedding, skating, the car crash. If I had known this would bring everything back, I would have grabbed a pan and hit myself.” Viktor hugs him tightly. Yuuri hugs him back and it doesn’t feel foreign like ll of the other times.. Like someone else is in his husband’s body. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Welcome back,” Viktor says. Yuuri smiles against Viktor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <span>Я тебя люблю,” Yuuri says. Viktor kisses him. They took him home and everyone celebrated the fact that Yuuri had all of his memories back. They ate Yuuri’s favourite Dishes and they all sang and danced. They got sparklers and danced on the beach, waving them at the dark, starry sky. Mari joked about the fact that they should go on another vacation to celebrate and Yuuri had already brought up once place he would like to go.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>______________________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We honestly don’t have to go if you really don’t want to,” Yuuri says. “Surely they will understand.” Vitkor gives Yuuri a look that he knows all to well. Aside from headaches here and there and the occasional soreness in his knee and hip, Yuuri is as good as new. They returned to the public eye and told everyone what had happened. Which caused people to be very supportive and relieved that he is okay and also people to be a tiny bit aggressive towards the people who in the beginning didn’t understand and were pressuring the two to tell everyone what happened. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nevertheless, everything has died down a bit and the skating season is winding down to an end. Yuuri has already flown to Thailand to visit Phichit who said he tried to visit so many times but his coaches have him on strict schedules. Yuuri told him it was fine and wished him luck for the Grand Prix Final. </span>
</p><p><span>“We have to,” Viktor says, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “We won’t be there long, two weeks, tops.”</span><span><br/></span> <span>“Who are you reassuring, me or yourself?” Yuuri asks. He doesn’t need any reassurance on how long they are going to be gone for. Viktor sighs heavily and looks down at his feet. “It’s going to be fine, okay?” He says. He can feel the anxiety buzzing off of Viktor all on the car ride to the air port and all during the plane ride. Any slight turbulence, his body goes tense - it never used to d that before, but there is something about going home that triggers his PTSD. The tiny echo in the dining room reminds him of his father screaming at him over dinner. There are little dents that unless you are really, really looking you can’t see them from his father throwing things at him. His doorframe to his room is still broken from when his father body slammed it because he locked himself in the room. Not to mention the country wide homophobia. </span></p><p>
  <span>Yurio and Otabek are picking them up, which eases his mind a little bit because people for the most part leave Yurio and any one he is with alone. They pick the tired couple up at the air port and drive them to their hotel where they crash on the bed, not bothering to unpack anything. In the middle of the night, Yuuri feels Viktor get out of bed and he hears him walking around the bedroom and then around the hotel room. He makes his way back into the room, closing the door behind him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you okay?” Yuuri asks, his voice low and tired. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I forgot to check the windows before we came in,” He says, laying back down. “They’re all locked. Everything is fine.” He adds. Yuuri’s hand finds Viktors and he kisses his knuckles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you more worried about what the homophobic people on the streets are going to say and do or are you more worried about your father?” Yuuri asks. Viktor goes tense. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Both…” He says slowly. “Maybe more my Father.” He adds. “Strangers, I can take because they don’t really know me so I never take anything they say to heart because they don’t know me. But I am part of him. He created me, and he has this scalding hate towards me for no reason and I swear to god one comment out of his mouth about you, and I’m going to start yelling and throwing things like he did to me.” Yuuri smiles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Give me the cue and things will start flying,” Yuuri says. Viktor smiles. Yuuri knows reassuring him that his father won’t say anything won’t help. Joining in on idealiation on inciting chaos is what Viktor needs. They talk about their game plan if chaos becomes the only option and they laugh until their sides hurt and until they are too tired to talk more. Mustering up all of the energy Yuuri has, he says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“In all honesty, you have me and your mother who are on your side, Vitya,” Yuuri kisses his forehead. “We love you past the moon and beyond the stars.” He nuzzles the crook of Viktor’s neck. He knows he is smiling as he wraps his arms around Yuuri. It’s not much to ease his mind, but it is enough to make him fall asleep and wake up the next morning refreshed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two are no strangers to jet lag. They both nearly drink three whole pots of coffee before they call a cab to Viktor’s childhood home where his mother is waiting anxiously for the two to show up. All of his fears aside, he is excited to visit his mother. She is going to be just as exited to see him and Yuuri - as it is now an inside joke that she loves Yuuri more than she loves her own son. She is waiting outside the front door for Viktor and Yuuri with a huge smile on her face. Viktor pays the driver and he and Yuuri get out of the cab. She walks over to them, of course, hugs Yuuri first then Viktor, further playing into the joke. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Welcome home,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says when she finally lets go of Viktor, she goes into full detail everything Viktor has missed as they walk inside and take off their shoes and coats. They walk to the living room and sitting on the couch watching the news is Viktor’s father with his resting bitch face and everything. Yuuri’s fingers interlace with Viktors and he gives his hand a little squeeze. His father just nods as his mother says she will get them all something to drink. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“How was the flight?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He asks Viktor dryly. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor replies, his leg bouncing up and down against the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not so bad, huh?” Yuuri whispers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll see,” He replies. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Dinner went about how Viktor thought it would go. His mother tried to rebuild the bridges burned between Viktor and his father. She tried her best to speak as much English as she could so Yuuri felt included. He surprised her with all of the Russian he knew which of course resulted in her teaching him more while they cleaned up from dinner. His father disappeared into his office while Viktor, his mother and Yuuri drank tea in the living room. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“He is just being his normal self,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>His mother says after a short while. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I told him to be on his best behaviour, and his response is to just sit in his office and sulk-</span>
  </em>
  <span>” she takes a long sip as they all hear shuffling and someone standing in the doorframe of the living room. His mother has a “speak of the devil” look on her face. He sits down, with a drink in his hand and waits for the conversation to start up again. Viktor’s jaw is clenched because he knows he is going to try to worm what ever idealization and point of view he has on Viktor’s life into the conversation and he is beyond putting up with it. He doesn’t say anything for a long while. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“How has skating been?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>It’s a safe topic between them. Skating, work, money, and food. Those are the safe topics where. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Good. I’m only doing coaching these days,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says making nice. Yuuri guesses everything is going very well because Viktor’s mother has a content look on her face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“Yuuri is going to be competing next year though.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>He adds, holding Yuuri’s hand to let him know that every thing is fine. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That is Amazing!” Viktor’s mother says in her thick Russian accent. She says it again in Russian for his father. Yuuri smiles and tells her about how excited she is. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“You two should renew your vows now that all of this mess is over,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says out of no where. Yuuri doesn’t get much of what she says so she turns to Viktor. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“We could do it here!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says. Viktor’s father’s eyebrows furrow and his jaw clenches tight and Viktor knows this isn’t going to end well. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Well, I would want Yuuri’s parents here. There just as much my family as you guys are,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No they’re not,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>His father says </span>
  <em>
    <span>“They didn’t raise you. You don’t have their blood in your veins. You don’t speak their language.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m more fluent in Japanese than you’ll ever be in English.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“We came here to visit you two. Not to be bombarded by you about how his family isn’t mine. We are married. Sooner or later you’re going to have to accept that.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor’s father jumps up to his feet, ready to yell. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Mikhail!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>His mother yells sharply which catches everyone off guard. With her tea cup elegantly in her hand she turns to Viktor. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“We can send an invite to Yuuri’s parents and we can do it here. Mikhail, if you are going to be an annoyance about it, you know where your office is, correct?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She sips her tea and sets the cup on a side table. She calls the boys a cab and they take it back to the hotel they are renting because Viktor most certainly needs a break and a debrief from his parents. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What were you guys taling about before we left?” Yuuri asks, sitting on the bed next to Viktor who was laying on his stomach. He starts rubbing the tension out of his back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My mom thinks we should renew our vows because of the whole amnesia thing,” Viktor says. “I don’t think its a bad idea, but I want to have your family there because your family is as much of my family as they are.” Yuuri smiles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think that would be nice,” He says. “Our families and friends all getting together again. Where to this time? Maybe we will give Christophe his wishes of having a strip show this time.” Viktor laughs, feeling as if the adrenaline from earlier is gone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“BYOL,” Viktor says. “Bring Your Own Lingerie.” The two both break out giggling. “Definitely no kids allowed-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“-Or parents if Christophe takes out the poles,” Yuuri says, tracing the outlines of Viktor’s back muscles as they talk about a vow renewal and all of the fun things they could do with it. “We could go to Vegas and have Elvis Presley officiate it.” They laugh harder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Imagine Yakov officiating a wedding,” Viktor ads, they spend the rest of their night impersonating Yakov until they fell asleep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Viktor dreaded going out with his parents for lunch the following afternoon. His father was always distant from the conversation and not paying attention - turns out hiding his poisonous anger towards Viktor’s sexuality occupies his entire mind. Yuuri talks to his parents about doing a vow renewal and they were so excited about it. Trying to find a place for it wasn’t as easy. They wanted to do it on a beach. Which in the end, everyone loved that idea and they set it for the summer since their wedding was in the winter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That night, they went back to Viktor’s parents house for Dinner, and Yuuri and his mother cleaned up, shooing Viktor and his father out to the living room in hopes of them settling their differences. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“They parent-trapped us,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says to his father, as he pours himself something to drink. He offers a glass to his father who declines - which isn’t normal because he always has a drink after dinner. It’s a long standing Nikiforov family Tradition. Viktor sits down feeling the tension as his father doesn’t get the reference he is making. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I am sorry I’m not the son you wanted,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says. His father looks at him with a face as stoned as Yakov’s. His jaw is clenched. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I was supposed to dominate figure skating until my joints and muscles couldn’t carry me anymore. I was supposed to find a woman, marry her, and have a child but here I am. I stopped skating to coach because I love it. I love seeing the sparks in all of my student’s eyes when they master a new jump or spin. I wasn’t going to force myself into a relationship that didn’t make me happy. I love him, dad. I know you don’t understand it and I know you hate that part of me, but I really do love him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I moved to Japan with him because it was hard being here because it was suffocating being here. It was hard being here and seeing how you looked at me with utter hate and disgust because I have no control over who I love.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor says, knowing this is the first time in years, since he came out, he has ever been honest with his father. He looks at Viktor with an expression he can’t read and he knows he is in for a lecture. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You could have pretended,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>His father says. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Viktor says, his voice sad and slow. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“No, I couldn’t have pretended to be straight because I would have been utterly miserable. I would have hated every aspect about myself because I didn’t let myself be happy and because I-I would have been living a lie. Mom always taught me not to lie. How is it everyone else in the family accepts me and came to the wedding but you? Don’t tell me it was because of work, because we both know you were not busy with work.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>His father remains silent. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“We’re going to have the vow renewal in Italy. You are more than welcome to come, but only if you’re willing to support us. Not because Mom made you go, but because you love me, and you are willing to accept I am with Yuuri.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Viktor’s father narrows his eyebrows because he doesn’t like being told what to do. </span>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>They were right on the beach in this beautiful house in Italy. They’re always either sitting out on the balcony or on the beach all day. They rented a big house with their friends - Phichit, Chris, Otabek, Yurio, and Yuuko. It’s nice having the whole friend group together again, especially when Christophe is talking about how he has brought poles. Though they’re going to save that for when all of the parents, who would be mortified, are asleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I swear we’re like a bunch of teenagers, waiting until the parents all go out for some fancy dinner to let all hell breaks lose,” Yuuri says to Viktor after the house has settled down long enough for Viktor and Yuuri to go relax in their bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. I don’t know who is more like a teenager, Yurio or Christophe,” Viktor says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why don’t we call it a tie?” Yuuri says. Viktor laughs and nods his head. “We should be getting to bed, tomorrow’s the bug day,” Yuuri says. He kisses the top of Viktor’s nose and he sinks into the mattress. The excitement that they both feet makes it hard to fall asleep, but eventually they drift off, dreaming about how everything is going to unfold tomorrow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>___________________________________</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Staying true to their superstitions, Yuuri woke up in the room alone with a note on Viktor’s pillow telling him that there is breakfast ready for him and that he will see him later in the day at the reception. Yuuri smiles, rolls his eyes because they’re technically still married. Yuuri decides to call Viktor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know that we are already married, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seeing the bride on your wedding day is bad luck!” Viktor says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are so superstitious,” Yuuri says, sitting down at the dining room table. “Wish you were here to eat this amazing chocolate french toast off of me.” he shrugs his shoulders and sighs heavily. “What a shame.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, I’ll be eating cake off of you tonight, so hold that thought,” With that, Viktor hangs up, leaving Yuuri stunned. He laughs to himself in the quiet of the hotel room. Well, it’s quiet until Yuuko comes bursting into the room. She is all dressed up, a pastel pink flowy sun dress and white heels. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Viktor sent me here to make sure you-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“-Don’t try to find him?” She nods her head. “Figures,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Plus, this can be like the first wedding, where we were drinking wine and freaking out about how you’re marrying your childhood idol.” She says, sitting down and taking a bite of his french toast. “I went to the venue and it is absolutely fucking gorgeous. Your mother is already crying at how beautiful everything is going to be.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She does know that we are coming back here and turing this place into a fucking strip club, right?” Yuuko shakes her head and laughs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is going to be the best vow renewal ever. I’ll make sure to keep the champagne coming she says.” Yuuri’s face gets red, remembering the Barcelona banquet that he spends a good quarter of his energy trying to block out whenever someone mentions strip clubs or Barcelona. But regardless, Yuuri knew today was going to be amazing and that no matter what, he is going to be happy because he has Viktor. He will always have Viktor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As promised, the venue was beautiful. Right on the beach, the water in the background, everything was white with potted mini cherry blossoms everywhere. Yuuri sees Viktor’s mother and Yurio translating for her, seeing as Viktor is keeping true to his superstitions about how it is unlucky to see the bride on the wedding day. Yuuri’s mother comes out of no where and hugs him so tight he can barely breathe. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh Yuuri you look so handsome,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She says. Everyone agreed that this was going to be more casual than formal. Yuuri has a white button up that he knows Viktor took the top two buttons off just for extra flare, and khakis that are rolled up. It is everything but formal, but it works. Yuuko scoots Yuuri off to a different room while he knows Viktor is coming out to see the Venue. While Yuuri waits, and sips on some wine, there is a knock at their door. Yuuri goes to open it but who ever is on the other side calls for him to keep it closed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Viktor?” Yuuri asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” He sounds a little panicked. “My dad is here.” He says. Yuuri’s eyes go wide. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I open the door?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No because it’s bad luck and I need all of the luck I can get right now,” He says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well seeing as I was in a car crash and survived, with amnesia and then got all of my memories back after I fell and hit my head, I think you can call me pretty lucky,” The door swings open and Yuuri doesn’t have a second to process the door opening before Viktor has wrapped his arms around him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh c’mon! All of that effort for no reason!” Yuuko says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Yuuko my eyes are closed,” Viktor says. Yuuri closes his eyes as well and hugs him back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s going to be okay, Vitya,” Yuuri says. “If he is going to be here, than he must have gotten over himself.” Viktor shrugs his shoulders. “Well, you can ask him to leave if he isn’t going to play nice.” Yuuri says. Wanting to open his eyes, but he doesn’t. He pulls away from Viktor, but keeps his hands on his shoulders. “It’s going to be okay, we will figure it out.” He moves his hands up to either side of Viktor’s face and kisses his forehead. Viktor nods, and slowly pulls away from him, and goes back out to where his mother is. Yuuko closes the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What was that all about?” she asks. Yuuri opens his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“His father is here,”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will punch any mother fucker who tries to ruin this day,” She says. Yuuri laughs and thanks her regardless. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he is ready to walk down the aisle - in which Yuuri thinks of this more as second wedding than a vow renewal. Everyone stands, including Viktor’s father, which surprises everyone who knows how homophobic he is.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know this past year wasn’t easy through the accident and everything and I will admit, it was a long walk back home to you. But I will walk on the road back to you every single time, again and again if it means we get to endlessly quarrel over who does the dishes,” Yuuri says. Vitkor smiles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I will run down the road to meet you, always have and always will. I promise,” Yuuri hears his parent’s sniffle and he knows Yuuko is shedding a tear or two. The reception was beautiful and elegant, but everyone knows Christophe is getting anstey for the real fun to begin. It does take a while before all of the parents go to their respected hotel and then everyone who is looking for a good time goes directly to Viktor and Yuuri’s room which has been changed to have four poles in the room and a lot of alcoholic beverages and of course a DJ waiting for them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How about that cake, hmm?” Yuuri says in Viktor’s ear as the music is rattling their brains. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thats for you and me later,” he says, kissing Yuuri’s cheek. “We’re gonna have some fun right now, and then more fun later.” He winks as he drags Yuuri to the dance floor. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yuuri woke up in his and Vitkor’s bed, still partly covered in cake and clothless with a wicked hang over. Yeah, no this is definitely not like any other wedding he has ever gone to. Viktor wakes up and lazily pulls him closer to Yuuri. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t finish eating all of the cake,” Yuuri says.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well if we didn’t dance so much than it wouldn’t be a problem,” Yuuri sighs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Does it look like a brothel out there?” Yuuri asks. Viktor nods his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Christophe made sure of it,” He says. “Oh these poor hotel cleaning ladies.” He says. They did rent the place out until tomorrow night and they are most definitely going to clean up as much as they can because they trashed the whole place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We should do this regularly,” Viktor says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Throwing a huge party like this that makes everyone think we’re all in some sort of sex ring?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, eat food off of each other,” Viktor says. Yuuri rolls his eyes - which makes his headache bound against his head. He shrugs it off because right now he is going to sleep in with Viktor and worry about the mess later. This is how his life should be. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>_____</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Viktor’s father, while he still remains very against Viktor and Yuuri he has learned to shove it down deep inside of him and learn to be happy for his son even if it goes against all of his ideals. Even if he heard about what happened in their hotel room - word and photos travel fast when ever you are around Christophe and there are even more drunk pole dancing pictures of Yuuri saved onto Viktor’s and Christophe’s phone much to Yuuri’s utter embarrassment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regardless, Yuuri couldn’t want a better life. He couldn't ever want a better husband, or better friends or a better family because here, even if he has amnesia or not, he is loved and supported and that’s all he needed. It’s how he was able to fast track the long windy road back to Viktor. Because they call everything on ice Love. No no wonder it was the ice - falling and hitting his head against it - that got him his memories back. </span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>AHH ITS THE ENDDDDDD </p><p>THANK YOU SO SO SO SO SO MUCH TO ALL OF YOU FOR READING THIS FIC! I HAVE HAD THIS IDEA FOR THIS FIC IN MY HEAD FOR A WHILE BUT JUST NO MEANS OF ACTUALLY GETTING IT OUT SO AH! I APPRECIATE ALL OF THE LOVE AND SUPPORT AND IDFK IF I'LL WRITE ANOHER YOI FIC SO STAY TUNED!!!!!</p><p>I am working on a Marauder era fic as well as a drarry fic so stay tuned for those if you are in any of those fandoms.</p><p>Again, thank you so much for reading this fic! I love you all so so much!! Stay safe out there loves!<br/>XOXOXOXOXOXOXO Tai</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ahh thank you for reading the first chapter of this fic!!! Are we even surprised I have written another Yuri!!! On Ice fic? No, no we are not. I hope you enjoyed it!! See you next monday for chapter 2</p>
<p>XOXO Tai</p></blockquote></div></div>
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